Why Can't We Just Take a Compliment?

I love to see women empowering other women. Standing by each other, supporting each other, building each other up- even positively commenting on another woman’s outfit can change her whole day. Even though it feels good to be complimented, why do we all find ways to deny the compliments we are given?

Being modest is a great trait to have, but our modesty often turns into self-deprecation. This is when we undervalue ourselves. Have you ever been told your hair looks great but instead of just responding with a simple “Thanks!”, you find yourself needing to dismiss the compliment? Our internal view of ourselves makes it difficult to believe others see us differently. When I receive a compliment, I somehow manage to come up with excuses as to why the compliment isn’t valid. We all deny ourselves little boosts of self-esteem and that needs to change.

I had never made this realization until I attended a self-image seminar last quarter. During the seminar, the speaker told the crowd that for your mind to fully accept a compliment, you must repeat it to yourself at least five times. This really resonated with me. We all need to find a way to practice self-love and be open to self-praise. Not only do we need to raise up the women around us, but more importantly, we need to raise ourselves up.

Try starting your day by completing the sentence: “I love myself because...”. Really mean what you say and allow it to sink in. In time, we will understand our worth and help others see it, too.