At one point in our lives, we’ll experience the pain of loss. We may feel loss after the end of a friendship or romantic relationship, or encounter the mind-numbing loss of losing a pet or loved one. It’s an inevitable part of the human experience, and unfortunately, we’re bound to continually face loss in all types of ways.
So then, what can we do about it? It’s something I did not think about until the passing of a friend shattered my perspective on life. The loss of life made me question, “What was the point of anything anymore?” It seemed so strange to recognize that not every day is a given. Since this realization, I’ve begun to reflect on how I live my life.
The first thing I learned from loss is just how precious relationships are. Whether it be a friend, family member, or romantic partner, the people we let into our lives have a way of becoming a part of us. I’m sure you’ve experienced it before: hanging out with a friend so often you begin to pick up some of their mannerisms and sayings, or your music tastes and sense of humor blend. Over time the people you connect with slowly become a part of you. It’s something that many people, including myself, take for granted every single day. It is something that I am trying to work on by being present in conversations and hangouts, appreciating the time I spend with friends and family.
I also realize how much value photos and videos can carry. Of course, we can recall old memories with our friends and family, but photos and videos of memories of them are a whole different experience. Looking back on old photos brings me back to exact moments in time, and also reminds me of the memories that I completely forgot about. Photos and videos have become a way to remember and cherish the memories of those who we lost.
The unfortunate thing about grieving a loss is that the world does not stop for anyone. Life around me continued to move forward like nothing happened. I learned that there is a time to grieve, and there is a time to take the first step in moving forward. This doesn’t mean forgetting the past, but rather finding a way to get back into the groove of the present.
Personally, it has been a difficult game of trying to balance remembering and moving forward. At first, it seemed so wrong to me to move on, because a loss of a friend was life-changing, and I thought it deserved all of my attention and energy. But over time I realized that at a certain point, it is important not to be stuck in the past, but to allow life to help us to keep moving forward and heal.
By no means is everyone’s experience with loss the same. Loss is an integral part of life and something that cannot be avoided. It is how we process loss, and what it can teach us about our own lives that makes it so important to the human experience. While we may encounter many losses in our lifetime, it is amazing to witness how we learn and grow from them.