It’s 1 a.m., you’re doom-scrolling through old photos on your phone, and suddenly there it is — your family eating dinner without you, your dog curled up on the couch and your hometown street glowing at sunset. Maybe you hear someone speaking your native language on campus, and your chest tightens for no clear reason. Homesickness has its funny way of sneaking up on you like that. At UC Davis, so many of us — first-years, transfers and international students — feel this quiet ache of missing home, even when everything “should” be exciting and new. If you’ve been feeling this way lately, you’re not weak — you’re human.
What homesickness actually feels like
Homesickness doesn’t always look like crying every night or wanting to book the next ticket home. Sometimes, it shows up quietly, like feeling lonely even when surrounded by people, or getting hit with random waves of sadness in the middle of an otherwise normal day. You start missing the smallest things: the smell of your kitchen, your mom’s cooking, late-night snacks from home, how safe your room can feel or speaking in your native tongue without having to explain yourself. It can even come with guilt — like, “Why am I sad when I’m so lucky to be here?” — which only makes the feeling heavier. And then there’s that subtle sense of being out of place, like you’re still learning how to belong. If any of this sounds familiar, you’re not dramatic or ungrateful – this is what homesickness actually feels like, and you’re not alone in it.
My personal experience with homesickness
For me, homesickness hit hardest during my first few weeks at UC Davis, when the excitement started to fade and the quiet moments set in. I’m from Thailand, and being so far away from home made everything feel extra distant. Not just the place, but the people, the food, the language and the tiny routines I never realized meant so much to me. I remember calling my family on this one night and trying to act “fine”. As soon as I hung up, I just sat there and cried. It surprised me how emotional I could become over small things like craving a meal from home or hearing my native language in a random video. That was the moment I realized: okay… I’m actually homesick. Not in a dramatic, movie-scene way — but in a quiet, heavy way that made me feel both grateful to be here and deeply longing for the comfort of home at the same time.
Coping with homesickness
Once you realize you’re actually homesick, the next step isn’t “fixing” the feeling — it’s learning how to take care of yourself through it. Start by bringing little pieces of home into your everyday life: cook a dish from your hometown, hunt down familiar snacks at an international grocery store or make food with friends who are also far from home (it turns into comfort and a bonding moment). Stay connected to the people you love, but in a way that doesn’t keep you stuck in the past — schedule calls, send voice notes or photos, and maybe even set “home days” where you catch up intentionally instead of constantly checking your phone. Let yourself feel seen through media too — watch shows in your home language, listen to the music you grew up with or recreate tiny rituals that remind you of who you are. At the same time, build a soft life here at UC Davis: find your comfort spots on campus, create a cozy corner in your room and build routines that help you feel grounded. And gently remind yourself not to isolate — join a club, say yes to small hangouts and try to make at least one “safe” friend you can be real with. Homesickness doesn’t disappear overnight, but these small, cozy habits can make being here feel a little more like home.
Homesickness isn’t a sign that you don’t belong
It’s easy to think that being homesick means you chose the wrong school or that you don’t really belong here — but that’s not true. Missing home doesn’t mean you’re failing at college life; it usually means you loved your life before you came here, and that love doesn’t just disappear once you move away. Growth is uncomfortable by nature, and sometimes it can feel lonely before becoming exciting. You can miss your old life and slowly build a new one at UC Davis at the same time — those two things don’t cancel each other out. Homesickness isn’t something you have to “get over” as fast as possible; it’s something you learn to carry more gently, until one day you realize you’ve made space for two homes in your heart.
WHat helped me personally
Two small things ended up helping me more than I expected. The first was building a simple routine that made my days feel a little more grounded — morning walks to class with a podcast in my ears, grabbing the same coffee after lectures and calling my family every Sunday night no matter how busy I felt. The second was comfort food: learning how to make one dish from home in my tiny kitchen and saving it for days when I felt especially off. There was one moment that made me realize I was starting to feel okay here — sitting on the Quad with a friend I’d slowly gotten close to, laughing about something random and noticing that I wasn’t counting down the days until my next call home. I still missed home, but in that moment, UC Davis didn’t feel so foreign anymore.
My Final thoughts
If you’re in that in-between stage — missing home while trying to build a life here — please remember that you’re not behind and you’re definitely not the only one feeling this way, even if it looks like everyone else has it all figured out. It’s okay to cry, even on days when nothing “bad” happened, and it won’t always feel this heavy, even if right now it feels endless. You’re allowed to grow slowly — there’s no deadline for feeling at home — and your feelings are valid, even the messy, confusing ones. If you’re reading this with a little heaviness in your chest, know that you’re brave for being here, for choosing something new, and for showing up even on the hard days. Homesickness doesn’t mean you’re weak; it means you’re human and capable of loving deeply. Be gentle with your heart as it learns to stretch and grow — little by little, the unfamiliar will start to feel familiar, and one day, UC Davis will feel like another kind of home.