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Learning to Be Comfortable in My Solitude: My Experience

The opinions expressed in this article are the writer’s own and do not reflect the views of Her Campus.
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at UBC chapter.

It’s a beautiful day. The sky is blue, the water is sparkling as sunlight falls on it, the breeze is pleasant, my coffee tastes just sweet enough (a rare occurrence), my book is captivating (a shout-out to Joan Didion’s Let Me Tell You What I Mean), and my Saint Motel album playing is the perfect background track for the moment. I love moments of solitude, picturesque, just as this one. Sometimes they are a late night at the library, or a walk back home in the rain. I have always enjoyed my own company but have only recently realized how much I value feeling this way. 

Over the past year, I have – oddly enough – had multiple conversations with friends about being comfortable spending time alone, and even prioritizing that time. University is a lot – a ton of work, a rush of emotions, a whole new crowd of faces, a fleet of new responsibilities. I think one of the most rejuvenating parts of my routine (and an important part of maintaining my sanity) is finding time to be by myself and enjoy it, no matter the circumstance. For example, I have found a strange comfort in doing laundry and will throw on a podcast, making a small ritual out of it. Some of my friends find it ridiculous that I enjoy my errands, but I don’t know how to explain it. Being alone gives me a sense of routine, a sense of calm. I think it is important to find things to do by yourself – whether errands or specific activities – and figure out a way to enjoy them, or at the very least become comfortable doing them in solitude. 

Unlike living at home, we are now by ourselves for a lot of our day, and I think it is important to find joy (no matter how stupidly cheerful that may sound) and comfort in that. I have always known that being alone is not equivalent to loneliness but only now feel thankful for that knowledge. It is natural to feel swept up by the speed of daily life and isolated from everyone around us. While it is only the tip of the iceberg, from personal experience, making time to have a “main character moment” by myself is super helpful! 

If you aren’t comfortable doing things by yourself, I hope these suggestions help you out! I love leaving for my classes a little early and taking the scenic route, grabbing a book and sitting in the Rose Garden as I read, grabbing a drink and going for a long walk, watching a comfort movie, cleaning my room with a nostalgic playlist, taking a crossword or sudoku book to a coffee shop, watching the sunset any chance I get, eating lunch by myself in a crowded cafe (a great exercise for becoming comfortable being by yourself), and cooking a nice meal just for myself!

Saumya is currently a student at UBC where she is studying International Economics. She is thrilled to be writing for Her Campus! She loves to read, travel, and watch films! She is still exploring her interests and is always open to learning more, especially in the field of journalism!
Katie is a third year student in the Faculty of Arts at the University of British Columbia, majoring in International Relations. In her free time, she likes watching movies, making Spotify playlists, and thrifting. By writing and editing for Her Campus, she hopes to explore her interest in journalism and writing.