Have you ever had a friend delete their social media (solve world peace) and make you feel guilty for not following suit? I certainly have.
In the last two years, I have noticed an uptick in my peers (19-25) choosing to delete social media apps from their phones or delete their profiles entirely. It usually goes something like this: “Oh, did you see that TikTok where the person does…?” Then, “No, I’m not on TikTok right now,” followed by uncomfortable silence and then laughter.
When I hear that someone has deleted all their social media apps, it feels like a dig. Somehow, they are instantly superior in both their self-control and general coolness. But why? After so many experiences like this, I have been trying to understand this phenomenon. Am I just insecure about my own complicity, or is there something bigger going on here?
Social media has become increasingly intertwined in our day-to-day interactions and our political economy—and, suddenly, some of us have gained a conscience. I would argue, however, that we’re all well aware of the fact that one person deleting their apps (and often not even their accounts) doesn’t lessen the monopolization of big companies like Meta or X. But, I’m becoming less certain that those I have dubbed as “social media deleters” are doing it for these reasons and more certain that it’s a social statement rather than a political one.
Deleting social media seems to be a form of virtue signalling, in some ways. Not having access to scrolling TikTok or Instagram Reels and more time to study or work is completely understandable, but doing the same thing on Instagram.com on your laptop browser is no better. As much as I have opinions on “Slacktivists” who post Instagram stories as the extent of their contributions to social change, I am equally unsure whether deleting social media as an act of resistance to the Orwellian surveillance of the algorithm or the climate injustice impact is the answer. The last two decades have socialized privileged people with online access into reliance on the internet and social media, and normalized it as necessary for social inclusion. If you don’t get the reference, someone isn’t always willing to explain it to you.
I couldn’t figure out why exactly my peers find deleting social media so virtuous, but I do hope someone has the answer, whether it supports my opinion or not. Next time a friend tells you they’ve deleted social media, ask them why on my behalf and get back to me. I did it too, don’t worry. Here are two of my chronic social media deleter friends’ points on why they don’t have Instagram or TikTok on their phones anymore.
The main reasons for not using it are exactly what you’d expect, and are understandable ones, I’ll admit. It’s distracting from school and life more generally; it isn’t good for your brain to be relying on the dopamine hits social media gives you, and you just don’t need to see everything everyone is doing. One mentioned that she found herself feeling like she had no free time for friends or hobbies outside of school and work, but also having 5 hours of screen time a day, which isn’t great. They also mentioned feeling frustrated that they had been devoting so much time to a system that was feeding big corporations and using their data to profit from. One friend mentioned her “5 minutes of Instagram time” on her laptop in the evenings and how she wishes she didn’t look forward to it like she does, even though it’s continually underwhelming. But she did say that while watching movies and working on homework, she finds herself much more focused and invested. The reactions she receives to “I don’t have Instagram or TikTok” are usually that people don’t care or don’t understand why, which she attributes to the extreme social norm it has become. Another friend said people commonly understand her reasoning, but that she does often feel “excluded from the bit” and doesn’t understand the popular trends at a given time.
I will say that I am more convinced now than I was before of the benefits of deleting social media, especially given that my screen time is terrible. But staying up to date on current events and what my friends are up to is important to me. Generally, I guess I’ll be more understanding next time someone tells me they don’t understand the reference, but I can’t promise I’ll explain it to them.