Nobody actually prepares you for the experiences you’re about to have before entering university. Sure, people warn you about the workload, tell you to stay on track and go to office hours, and remind you to enjoy every second of it, but there are some things you can only really understand once you’re living through them yourself.
After surviving my first year at U of T, here are a few things I could tell you to make you feel less alone while starting a new journey in your life.
Soo… High School Was a Scam
Well, perhaps “scam” is somewhat hyperbolic, but trust me when I say that high school was not a preparation for university for me.
I watched so many first-years, including myself, struggle with the jump from high school to university. You suddenly realize that what used to work for you before isn’t working anymore, and you can’t cram everything the night before the test. Everything moves much faster, 24 hours in a day seem like far too little time, and before you know it, your grades may even start to make you question your whole life’s worth.
Almost everybody goes through that struggle at some point, and a bad mark does not equal stupidity or a lack of belonging somewhere.
Wait… I’m the Adult Now?
Leaving your parents feels like unlimited freedom and fun until you realize there is no one to check whether you have had dinner.
Whether you live in a residence or on your own in an apartment, you’ll have to take responsibility for your own time doing your laundry, making your appointments, managing money, buying food, and, most importantly, staying alive.
It is indeed not easy to become your own guardian, but knowing that you can do it is perhaps the coolest thing about leaving home.
Friendship Speed-Dating Is Basically a First-Year @ university’s Requirement
Name? Program? Where are you from? Instagram?
Repeat 500 times during orientation week.Â
There will be so many people you’ll come across within your first year, but you shouldn’t expect them all to become your lifelong besties. Even that person you’ve become attached to during orientation week…. It’s a canon event.
The circle changes, and there will always be new people around you in the most random places possible. So don’t feel pressured to have found your tribe within the first week of university.
Unfortunately, Life Does Not Check Your Syllabus
I thought the biggest things I’d have to worry about in university were exams, assignments, and living away from home. Unfortunately, life had other plans.
During my first year, I dealt with personal loss and the fear of watching conflict unfold in Iran while my immediate family was back home. It taught me very quickly that life doesn’t pause just because you have a midterm on Friday.
You can’t prepare for everything. Sometimes, getting through university means accepting that you aren’t going to function 100% all the time, and giving yourself a little grace when you can’t.
Turns Out, Asking for Help Is Actually a Life Hack
I wish I realized sooner just how many resources universities have.
Academic advisors, professors, TAs, mental health resources, financial advising… the list goes on. I’ve had situations become so much less overwhelming simply because I finally asked the right person for help.
You don’t get bonus points for suffering in silence. Ask the question. Send the email. Talk to the advisor.
Calendar/Planner
This advice may be somewhat hypocritical in that I have not done this flawlessly either, but PUT EVERYTHING IN YOUR CALENDAR.
Your brain will tell you, “I’ll remember that assignment.”
Your brain is lying.
Go through your syllabus at the beginning of each semester and enter everything—quizzes, assignments, midterms—anywhere that you can access from your phone. You will be very grateful for this in the future.
Everyone Has Their Life Together (Except They Don’t)
There will always be someone better at studying, at securing internships, who has more friends, more extracurricular activities, and enough time to go out three times a week.
Comparing yourself to everyone else will only make you go insane.
I am in my second year now, and I still haven’t got it all together. I am not exactly where I want to be academically and professionally; my time management needs a lot of improvement, and sometimes I don’t even know what I’m doing.
But the truth is, I’ve come to accept that this is the point.
I completed my first year (somehow), I made a lot of mistakes, and there were some unexpected events. But if I could talk to myself from one year ago, I would tell her she doesn’t have to have university, or anything else, figured out just yet.
Neither do you.