College is a time of immense change. From discovering independence, to adjusting to new academic challenges and figuring out what you want your future to hold, there’s no denying that this experience can be overwhelming at times. While we focus on navigating internships, career paths, and class, one of the most significant and important parts of this journey often gets overlooked: friendship.
Here, at the University of Michigan, my friendships are a lifeline, offering support and a sense of belonging in a world that often feels chaotic and at times foreign. But as I get older, well into the first part of my junior year, I have grown and evolved and so have the friendships that I hold close. So how do we maintain meaningful and lasting friendships while at the same time embracing change? Here’s my guide to navigating the ebbs and flows of college friendships.
- Quality over quantity
It can be really tempting to surround yourself with as big of a group as possible, especially if it’s your first year. There is strength in numbers. There are so many opportunities to meet new people and to grow your group. However, the pressure to maintain a large social circle can be draining, and can lead to some of your quality friendships to suffer.
So instead of spreading yourself too thin, think about the people that make you feel the happiest, like the best version of yourself, someone who you can be yourself around. These are the people who will understand you, provide you emotional support, and be there through the highs and lows of your college career.
2. Understanding that your friendships are going to change
In college our priorities shift. The friendships that we’ve spent time nurturing may no longer serve us in the same way. Maybe the hall mate you clicked with freshman year isn’t in your social circle anymore, or your best friend is studying abroad and it’s hard to keep in contact. This can feel like such a loss, but it’s important to remember that this is totally and completely natural.
While some friendships can withstand change and evolve others won’t. And that’s okay.
3. Balancing Independence and Togetherness
One of the hardest parts for me was learning how to balance independence with togetherness. On one hand, college is about your own personal growth and pursuing your own goals. On the other hand, new friendships require time and effort.
It’s crucial to prioritize both and set boundaries for both. Set aside time for your friends and at the same time, don’t be afraid to stay home one night or focus on yourself when needed.
College friendships are a vital part of the experience. They are a great part. They provide encouragement, camaraderie, and support in a time of significant personal growth. By embracing change and prioritizing meaningful deep connections you can navigate this tricky time with confidence.
Friendships, like any other part of your life, require understanding and effort. So whether you’re a new freshman just getting started or you’re a junior like me reflecting on the friendships you’ve made, remember that the journey is just as important as any destination. So hold those friends close and enjoy the ride.