Dear Reader,
As February, the month of love, slowed to an end, March, the month of luck, rolled in. Ditching the hearts and vibrant red, we put up bright green and gold decor. The flicks of Valentines and Galentines were stowed away in our memories as we prepared for the festivities of St. Patty’s. But one’s emotions linger as the light of one overshadows the other.
It’s said that the ones who find love are lucky and the ones that are lucky find love. However, I’ve long disliked this deeply internalized narrative that society has about love — that it’s something you find or that finds you in the form of another person, romantically or platonically. What is lost in this narrative is the love we owe ourselves.
First and foremost, love should be searched for within, where it already exists. To me, the ones who find love in themselves and harness that inner peace are the truly lucky ones.
Self-love and self-care are buzzwords that we frequently see romanticized on TikTok and Instagram. However, the truth is that these are arguably the hardest things to find for yourself. Throughout our busy lives, we pick and choose between the demands of our academics, family, and social life. Sometimes our own needs take a back seat before we realize it. There’s nothing wrong with this, it’s just part of the motions of life. It’s also incredibly important to recognize when we’ve put off caring for ourselves to the extent that it’s become a foreign concept.
This search for inner love is a journey, not a destination. Caring for yourself doesn’t need to cost money. It doesn’t need to be aesthetically pleasing or follow social media’s idea of “wellness” or “self-care” should look like.
Self-love means showing up for yourself.
It’s knowing what’s best for you and learning your boundaries–and abiding by them.
It’s listening to yourself and being attuned your emotions.
It’s being able to say no when you need to and being able to grow past feelings of guilt and FOMO.
It’s finding comfort in solitude and enjoying your own company.
I’m not perfect and this letter is just as much for myself as it is for you. As I write this I am reminding myself, and you, to search for love within and become one of the lucky ones.
Fill your own cup so you can pour into others’ cup, whether it be platonically, romantically, or through small acts of kindness.
Gently,
Someone in the pursuit of self-love, too.