If there’s one thing that I’ve learned in art school, acrylic paint dries fast. You can paint something new, layer over it, or pretend it’s not there, but once it sets, you cannot blend it. As an artist, I’ve always found this incredibly frustrating, but over time, I have come to realize how unapologetically powerful this trait is.
Throughout the course of my life, I’ve let people walk all over me. Whether that be my kindness, my time, and my forgiveness, I am notorious for letting people “reuse” me. I accept the same apology 20 times, give second chances when they’re not deserved, and pour my heart out to those who only reach out when they’re bored.
Soon enough, I found myself wondering if I could take a page out of acrylic paint’s book — I should stop letting people use me — if acrylic paint doesn’t go back when it’s dry, why should I?
For a long time, I believed that second chances were a sign of maturity. I would bend over backwards to please and accommodate others- even if they didn’t deserve it. The hard truth is that not everyone deserves a second chance. Someone who used you once and didn’t appreciate you shouldn’t have the power to do it again. So don’t let them. Because before you know it, you’ll find yourself lost. Dull. Watered down to a different state.
Being like acrylic paint isn’t about holding grudges. It’s about holding yourself up to certain standards, keeping boundaries from those who break them far too easily, and understanding your worth. Once someone shows you their true colors — and continues to show you — your job isn’t to try and fix them. Your job is to protect yourself. At the end of the day, you come first. Decide who is worth your time- your energy, and surround yourself with people who deserve you.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m guilty of going back to ex’s, keeping bad friends for far too long, or allowing myself to be a doormat, but these experiences all shaped me into the person that I am today. I’ve learned that you don’t need to erase the past — but you don’t stay trapped in it either. You grow, you learn, and you heal. Soon enough, you’ll come to understand that boundaries are normal, healthy even. Those who respect your boundaries won’t guilt you for having them.
Once you learn the power of protecting your peace, your energy will shift. You’ll attract people who are worthy of you, ones that respect and value you, and won’t disappear when you dry. People will stop trying to repaint you into another version of yourself.
So, the next time you find yourself dulling your colors to appease someone else, think of acrylic paint. Acrylic paint doesn’t wait around for someone for has already cleaned their brushes, neither should you.
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