THIS IS NOT A DRILL. THIS IS NOT A DRILL. Last Thursday, the queen of break up songs — Taylor Swift — announced that she was moving up her version of Red a week earlier than originally scheduled. Red has always and will always (always and forever?) be the best break up album, and I personally am not ready to be sobbing to this on Nov. 12. Will I listen to it anyway? Absolutely.
I need all of the sad girls in the room to make a pact with me: we will NOT be drunk texting Taylor Swift lyrics to our exes. Yes, I know that the 10-minute-long version of “All Too Well” is coming out, but we need to stay strong. We’ve made it this far without sending a regrettable text. So, let’s reminisce on some of Taylor’s lyrics throughout the years that made you want to hit send, but refrain.
1. “And you call me up again just to break me like a promise / So casually cruel in the name of being honest”
I promised myself that I wouldn’t fill this list with “All Too Well” lyrics, but I would be doing T-Swizzle a disservice if I didn’t drop in this gut-wrenching line.
2. “You said it was a great love / One for the ages / If the story’s over / Why am I still writing pages?”
This one hits too hard when you’re still holding a candle for someone who’s gone.
3. “Don’t you think I was too young to be messed with? / The girl in the dress, cried the whole way home, I should’ve known”
If you’ve ever been involved with an older person, you know how it feels to ignore every piece of advice from your friends and family and every instinct in your body just because they made you feel special. Side note: Screw you, John Mayer. SHE WAS NINETEEN.
4. “It never ever occurred to you / That I can’t say “hello” to you / And risk another goodbye”
Ouch.
5. “You can plan for a change in the weather and time / But I never planned on you changing your mind”
No matter how often I listen to this lyric, I sob every time. I mean COME ON???
6. “But we were something, don’t you think so? / Roaring 20s, tossing pennies in the pool / And if my wishes came true / It would’ve been you”
Sometimes wanting someone or something so bad isn’t enough and that’s okay. It just sucks for a little bit.
Brb…going to pretend-breakup with my long-term relationship so that I can listen to Red with all of the feels.
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