“The middle of nowhere” is a pretty accurate way to describe Grafton, New York. Driving down the roads, you pass wetlands, a rusted water tower, and a general store stocked with a little more than the essentials: coffee, canned goods, and toilet paper. Yet, tucked within the town is a lake surrounded by a tight-knit community. After spending many weekends there throughout the summer, I learned that the quietness and seclusion are what make the lake so special. These slow summer moments were exactly what I needed after my first year of college, teaching me four lessons that I will keep in mind as I begin my sophomore year.
1. Not everything has to be productive.
As busy college students, our days are scheduled meticulously, going from classes to clubs, from meetings to studying. As we pack more into our days, the pressure to maximize every moment builds. This can be exhausting, especially when you’re trying to balance academics with a social life and healthy habits. While the fast pace of college is exciting, sometimes slowing down is necessary. At the lake, I could spend two hours reading on a hammock and a whole afternoon hiking with my dad without overthinking if it would fit into my schedule. I could sit on the dock talking to my sisters without worrying about what I could be doing instead. This summer, letting time pass no longer felt like a “waste,” and I realized that not every moment needs to be productive. Resting, reading, or laughing with family is valuable, even if there is nothing to show for it at the end of the day.
2. Meals are worth slowing down for
Dinner at the lake rarely happens quickly. It’s a process that begins on Saturday mornings at the farmers’ market, usually with buying whatever is in season, like tomatoes and peaches. After we bring the ingredients home, everyone contributes in different ways. My mom puts together the salad while my dad grills, and my sister and I bake the dessert. By the time dinner is actually served, hours have passed. Preparing food is a huge part of the day, but it becomes more about spending time together than the actual meal. While the convenience of dining hall meals is nice, it feels like a contrast to these dinners. This year, whether I am sitting in Starbucks with my friend or grabbing dinner at the dining hall, I want to make sure I don’t rush through meals, and I actually enjoy the time spent around the table.
3. The best moments are not always planned
A weekend at the lake is not complete without a rainstorm. Throughout the summer, I began to realize that these storms brought moments we otherwise would have missed. Running to the house to avoid getting soaked and spending the afternoon inside does not mean the day went wrong. Instead, we take out the playing cards, the chessboard, or other ways to pass the time together. When the rain is gone and we go back outside, the air feels cooler, the water looks cleaner, and a rainbow sometimes peeks from behind the clouds. The unexpected change of plans in the middle of the day doesn’t mean the day is ruined, just that it looks different than expected. Days in college can often go similarly, as sometimes things are canceled or altered. This change is frustrating in the moment, but sometimes unexpected changes are the best parts of the day.
4. Connection is built in unexpected places
The houses around the lake are spread out; however, that does not mean there is a lack of strong community. People on boats wave as they pass, neighbors bring our family extra firewood, and even our dogs get treats when we walk by certain houses. These interactions show that people can build connections even when they are far apart. My family and I also find ourselves getting closer throughout these summer weekends. Instead of rushing to our different commitments, my sisters and I have the time and space to be together, which is hard to find but important to prioritize during the school year.
As I begin my sophomore year, I know that my days will become more structured and busy. However, I can carry some lessons from these slow lake days with me. I will remember that an afternoon spent relaxing is not a waste, or that a meal with friends and family is often better than something quick and convenient. I will remember that moments for connection are still there and should not be ignored, even when life gets busy. The moments that we take to slow down can become the most important memories.