It’s that time of the year again-Valentine’s season. A time for mushy Facebook posts (you still have month-aversaries after 17 months??), cute couple photos (no, I would not like to see you kissing in the snow, thank you), and meticulously planned dates and gifts (Wow! You’re going to go on a helicopter ride around the city while drinking champagne and eating truffles?! I care, I swear!). For those of us who do not have someone to skywrite our names, think Valentine’s Day is a fake holiday, or just really really love food, I’m going to help ease the pain of this season by taking you on a journey through the 5 foods that are better than boyfriends.
Food Number 1: The Mac and Cheeseburger
This burger has everything you could want in a food (and possibly even a man). Two patties stuffed with creamy mac and cheese crammed between two hot, toasted buns. Who needs a caress on the cheek when you can have the warmth of mac and cheese and the power of a burger? Those are the qualities of a real Valentine’s Day date.
Food Number 2: Cheesecake Blondies
In case the photo didn’t have you sold on how amazing this dessert is, it is also gluten free. Yeah, that means everyone can enjoy it. Instead of suffering through an awkward milkshake sharing experience (yes I want two straws so I can have double the sucking power to finish this milkshake off…alone), pop these babies in the oven and instantly feel the love. Recipe here
Food Number 3: Chubby Hubby Truffles
Does the name not just scream “Valentine’s Day?!” Why spend a day searching for your own chubby hubby just to be disappointed when he spends the night talking about his ex girlfriend when you can have more love radiating from these peanut butter pretzel truffles? And you can enjoy them in the comfort of your own home! Recipe
Food Number 4: Sweet(ie) Potato Fries With Garlic and Herbs
If you say that you can look at this picture of fries and not shed a small tear, then you are a liar. Sure, your roommate got a giant teddy bear and roses, but you got to spend the night with THE MOST PERFECT FRIES EVER. Bonus points: since you are a strong, independent woman, you will not need to worry about the garlic breath that may follow. It is also guaranteed to turn away your tied-down friends, leaving more for you.
Food Number 5: Grilled Banana Bread Peanut Butter S’mores
While the title of this one may be as confusing as males, the result is definitely more rewarding. This food combines literally everything that is great in this world. When your friends come in parading their light-up heart headbands and diamond bracelets and stupid heart chocolates (not that chocolate is ever stupid…) just remember that you are holding the greatest invention since online pizza ordering. And that is the greatest gift of all.
Thank you to the Buzzfeed food section for always keeping me hungry. Photo credits to Buzzfeed.