For as long as I can remember, I have been afraid of failure.
It all began in school when I would be scared to get a bad grade or fail a test after I had put so much time and effort into my work. I think that stems from my struggle with academic validation, and realizing how much I choose to identify myself with my accomplishments rather than with the person I am.
As I am now in my final year of university, I have learned a lot about myself, where my fear of failure comes from, and how it impacts me.
With that being said, the pressure of perfection is no stranger to me. No matter how far I run from the constant fear to succeed, it somehow always finds me.
Within the last few months, I have been increasingly aware of the fact that graduation is creeping nearer, and there is no room for anything but perfection. There has been a lot of pressure to get good grades and find an internship within a short period of time. This has created more room for rejection than I can handle at times.
Receiving a low grade on an assignment or getting rejected by a desired internship position impacts me more than I would like to admit.
These aspects are not a representation of who I am, and slowly but surely, I have been able to come to terms with the fact that failure does not define me.
Here are some of the strategies I am currently using to help me overcome my fear of failure.
- Set Attainable Goals
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Regardless of how big or small the task is, I have gotten into the habit of writing down various goals and expectations I have for myself every day.
Breaking down my assignments, readings and daily goals into a step-by-step process allows me to feel less overwhelmed. This way, I can feel a sense of accomplishment whenever I cross something off my list, as I am one step closer to completing my goals for the day.
- Remember that we all have to start somewhere
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Allowing myself to be challenged and learn from my mistakes can be the hardest part of fearing failure.
I try to constantly remind myself that I was once a beginner at everything. There is no shame in developing new skills, making mistakes and learning from them.
- Redefine the definition of success
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It can be a lot easier to associate myself with failure when I do not have a solid understanding of what success actually means to me.
I have learned that success does not need to be associated with grades and validation; however, that is easier said than done. Putting myself out in the world and giving every task my all, while also learning to cope with unforeseen obstacles will make me more successful in life.
But I can’t lie and say that my fear of failure has completely disappeared.
Day by day, I am working on achieving small goals that reinforce a positive mindset and outlook on success. I am learning that who I am is more than enough and that will not be overshadowed by my fears any longer.