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Toronto MU | Wellness

How Mel Robbins & The ‘Let Them’ Theory Changed My Life

Alana Carras Student Contributor, Toronto Metropolitan University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at Toronto MU chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

Mel Robbins is a renowned motivational speaker, bestselling author, and life coach who has inspired millions worldwide with her interpretation of the “let them” theory.

The “let them” theory is about relinquishing control over others and allowing ourselves to be free from the need to fix, change, or control the people around us. It’s about accepting others as they are, free of judgment, and allowing ourselves to accept their choices or opinions. 

Robbins advocates that when we let go of these emotional burdens and release the need to control others, we allow ourselves to grow, find peace, and be open to understanding our own lives.

The “let them” theory has rapidly spread across social media, podcasts, and Robbins’ live events, touching and impacting millions. The theory’s approach to self-help and mindfulness, combined with Robbins’ relatable stories and practical strategies, allows this concept to reach a broad audience. 

As people continue to go through life and find themselves managing relationships, personal growth, career decisions, and so much more, the “let them” theory has resonated with those hoping to reduce stress and embrace peace. It’s the simple idea of letting things go and letting go of the need to control. 

Through her multiple platforms, Robbins has reached people from all walks of life, creating a ripple effect. She has also sparked conversations about letting go of unrealistic expectations and shifting our mindset to allow space for genuine, authentic connections. 

The Mel Robbins Podcast is one of the top podcasts in the world right now, with over 1.7 million monthly listeners and 3.1 million monthly downloads. Through this podcast, she has impacted the lives of many, reflecting on her personal experiences and giving advice on creating a better life for yourself. 

Robbins recently published her world-famous book The Let Them Theory alongside her daughter, Sawyer Robbins. It’s a step-by-step guide on how to stop letting other people’s opinions, decisions, drama, and judgment impact your life and your happiness. 

Incorporating the “let them” theory into my life has been a game-changer. I used to find myself frustrated by the decisions or actions of others, whether it was a friend making an unwise decision, disagreeing with a family member or a co-worker working in a way I didn’t agree with. I would often feel the need to intervene, be right, offer advice, or try to “fix” the situation. But the “let them” theory has taught me that I don’t need to do that. 

Rather than trying to take control, I have learnt to release control. For example, there have been instances when my close friends chose to exclude me multiple times for reasons I didn’t understand. I used to feel the need to voice my opinion and tell them how that made me feel. But now, I am choosing to let them not invite me and realize that I shouldn’t waste my time and energy on people who make me feel like they did.  

Incorporating this into your life starts by recognizing when others’ choices negatively impact you and then asking yourself: Am I trying to control this situation? If the answer is yes, allow yourself to let go. Trust that others can make their own decisions and that those choices are often a blessing in disguise. 

Adopting the “let them” theory has significantly impacted my emotional well-being and outlook on life. By choosing to stop allowing people’s opinions and choices to affect me, I’ve noticed a reduction in stress and anxiety. It has allowed me to focus on myself and my personal growth without being distracted by the actions of others.

Ultimately, the “let them” theory helps create space for your future to unfold naturally. You will find yourself at peace, less reactive, and open to new opportunities, personal growth, and genuine joy. 

In the wise words of Mel Robbins, “Let them.

Alana Carras

Toronto MU '28

Alana Carras attends Toronto Metropolitan University. She is a second year student enrolled in the Sport Media program. She has a great passion for writing and sports, hoping one day to work in professional sports as a host and/or reporter. Her interests are fitness, shopping, and wellbeing. When she is not writing for HC TMU, she is spending time with her friends and family, watching Gilmore Girls, or keeping active.