It’s no surprise that Gen Z has become known as one of the most progressive and people-oriented generation. And I don’t say this due to an overarching ego about my generation, but rather, Gen Z is the first generation to truly understand the outreach of social media, technology and its connection to everybody worldwide.
The power of short and attention-grabbing social media, in the form of TikToks and Instagram Reels, allows for the spread of knowledge more than ever! Much of the content I’ve noticed on my feeds seems to focus on how we should approach our interpersonal relationships, whether with friends, family, relatives, or peers.
A topic taking the internet by storm is the implications of psychology in our everyday lives. From the internet, bringing awareness to mental health, to psychoanalysis, and more, Gen Z has applied this ‘deeper thinking’ to their daily interactions, turning them into 60-second or less videos of Gen Z humour.
“Protecting Your Peace” is a phrase that some may know all too well, referring quite literally to one who guards (protects) their emotional, spiritual, and mental well-being. Phrases which parallel this narrative include “Taking space”, “Setting a boundary”, “Releasing what doesn’t serve you anymore,” etc. This follows the category of therapy speak.
Therapy speak encompasses the use of psychological terms outside of a therapy setting, sometimes without a complete understanding of their meaning and depth. Therapy speak has been increasingly normalized and used amongst the internet and Gen Z; this use of therapeutic language allows for a foundation of intellect and concrete identification of what exactly we are feeling.
With words feeling like a barrier to our expression of emotions, we often rely on these objective descriptions as a way to feel ‘more valid’ about our abstract emotions. Such identification of emotions and boundary building is vital in our relationships and in maintaining our mental health.
This prioritization of mental health in our day and age is an important development, breaking the cycle of accepting emotional neglect or abuse from those around us and prioritizing ourselves. These sentiments carry the benefits of lower stress levels and help us become the best version of ourselves.
Despite what the phrase suggests, “Protecting your peace” doesn’t only do yourself a favour, but can positively impact those in argument with you. This setting of boundaries between both parties results in a critical reflection of each person’s needs, wants, and an analysis of what is bothering them. Such scenarios provide an opportunity for both parties to view the situation from a bird’s-eye view and reflect on their own mistakes and those of the other party. By bettering yourself and prioritizing your mental health, a ripple effect is formed; you not only identify your feelings for yourself, but also in conversation with those around you.
This alone seems to justify the use of over-therapeutic speech. However, certain circumstances suggest that the overuse of this within friendships can lead to both disconnection and avoidance in human connection. So, can it damage our relationships?
To put it simply, the overuse or misuse of anything can cause us harm; it amplifies the intended effect and directs the conversation to a guarded one with little to no leeway. The use of these boundaries, combined with a lack of expansion or openness to proper conversation, results in difficulty facilitating emotionally mature and intelligent conversations. Emotional maturity and intelligence in this sense don’t have to equate to an overly objective analysis of each response. Rather, emotional maturity takes into perspective the strength of each emotion, its root cause, and what further actions can be taken to prevent these issues in the future. As a result of therapy talk, productive arguments plummet and avoiding accountability persists; this accountability isn’t only for those in the wrong, but also for starting the conversation.
Maintaining friendships and relationships requires an open mindset. As the phrase goes, “To have a village, you must be willing to be a villager.” Building community despite the trouble it might put you through in some circumstances can be worth it; you allow yourself to have a friend!
Frankly, all relationships are a two-way system, a symbiotic relationship; even though those helping actions might not be reciprocated right away, they must eventually follow, and the effort must be there. The employment of therapeutic speech requires the respect of another, a foundational aspect. Still, it overlooks the most important part: the opportunity to listen to and consider varying perspectives as equally possible.
Though it is crucial for us to keep ourselves a top priority, sometimes those late-night talks, long conversations and heart-to-hearts with friends are worth the trouble.