“Love isn’t patient and kind and humble. Love is messy, and horrible, and selfish, and bold…”
Ellie Chu
There’s no better way to begin a relationship than by faking a series of letters and building an entirely new persona… right?
In a film with plot points oddly reminiscent of Ratatouille (hear me out), the 2020 Netflix romantic comedy The Half of It takes viewers on a journey of self-discovery and the courage it takes to be honest–with yourself and others.
In the small, God-fearing town of Squahamish, Washington, Ellie Chu—an introverted but talented writer—reluctantly accepts Paul Munsky’s pleas to make him intellectually appealing to one of the most beautiful girls at school, Aster Flores.
When Paul enlists Ellie to write love letters on his behalf, they develop an unlikely friendship. As they collaborate, the line between honesty and deception begins to blur—especially when Ellie starts developing feelings for Aster herself. What unfolds is not a story about competition or romantic conquest, but one about connection, individuality, and love in all its complicated forms.
It’s a true coming-of-age story that captures the awkwardness and struggles faced in the transition from adolescence to adulthood. Further driving the story are the drastically different backgrounds of all three.
- Paul is a golden retriever jock from a large, working-class family.
- Ellie is one of the only Chinese-American students helping her widowed, grieving father keep things afloat (think of Katniss’ mom from the Hunger Games).
- Aster is the preacher’s daughter, who loves art and literature but feels stifled by her family’s strict expectations.
All three confront the beliefs that shaped them, questioning where they belong and who they want to be.
Now, as autumn settles in and the scent of pumpkin spice fills the air, marking the transition of the seasons, what better time to settle down and watch a coming-of-age rom-com?
personal connection
Despite having long graduated from high school, The Half of It still holds a special place for me. When it was released in 2020, during the COVID-19 pandemic, I was a queer teenager and a high school senior in South Texas, preparing to step into the next chapter of my life. Its humor and message brought me comfort in a turbulent time.
Looking back now, I appreciate how the film made me feel seen—as a daughter of immigrants, a queer teen, and someone learning to navigate change.
With that being said, here are some impactful scenes that still resonate with me today.
Review with spoilers continued below
At its core, The Half of It is about community, faith, and the defiance of traditional tropes. It refuses to succumb to surface-level cliché narratives, instead exploring the multifaceted nature of love, grief, and identity.
One of the most powerful moments is when Ellie tells Aster, “I don’t believe in God.”
Aster replies, “That must be so nice,” to which Ellie says, “It’s not. It’s lonely.”
This exchange captured the feeling of not belonging, of being an outsider in your own world. Ellie doesn’t fit into her town’s religious community, while Aster feels trapped by it.
Another important moment is Paul’s initial reaction when he discovers Ellie’s feelings for Aster. The friendly golden retriever disappeared in an instant, instead replaced by instinct, “It’s a sin. You’re going to hell.”
While initially jarring, the response makes complete sense given his upbringing, which was steeped in strong traditional values. What’s remarkable is that he doesn’t stay there. Paul wrestles with his beliefs, questioning the traditional values he was raised with. In the end, he chooses compassion and understanding without abandoning his love for his family or his faith.
“I always thought there was one way to love, one right way. But there are more, so many more than I knew,” Paul proclaimed in the church. “I never want to be the guy who stops loving someone for loving the way that they want to love.”
Then there’s Aster. She’s the beautiful girl next door, but she was portrayed as more than that. She’s also smart and hardworking, and the film didn’t shy away from that.
Perhaps that’s why I found the ending so refreshing. She isn’t a prize to be won or anyone’s “endgame.” Instead, she’s a person still finding herself, just like Ellie and Paul.
By the end, each character is ready to embark on their next chapter. They go their separate ways, but the door isn’t closed. It might be tempting to say it’s about “the friends they made along the way,” but the film goes deeper than that. Beneath its humor, The Half of It explores the complex relationships between family, friends, and community. Altogether, it shows how we are shaped by where we come from, but are not defined by it.