Last week, I was reminded that I am Black

Why does it have to be so complicated? Why does the color of my skin bother you so much that you hurt me, a mere human like you?

I really would want to live in this world with no extra precautions taken because I am black. Colors? I do not want to see them too, but what choice do I have? Just like you, or maybe unlike you, I do not want to be reminded that I am black, because being reminded has never translated into a good experience or a fair sight.  

Last week. I was reminded that I am black yet again. How you may ask? A racist encounter? A micro-aggression? No, neither of these was unfortunately the circumstance. I was reminded that I am black in the comfort of my room, cozied up in my bed, wrapped up like a burrito in my favorite comforter that smelled like me. I was reminded of this in my own space, crossing no boundary, and with no other person in sight but myself. That awareness made me realize I could not escape from this reality even in the place I find solace in the most. Oh, the dejection in that juxtaposition, and the feeling of my heart ripping to shred in the face of the reality that just struck. 

It was not the first time I was reminded, in fact, it was not the second, or third. Maybe the 30,001st time? But that does not matter because this time it felt different. It was different because it brought about the awareness that no matter how successful I get, and how willing I was to be more than just a black person, every day, I am confronted with that reality. The disgusting part of that reality.

Being black is ethereal, and above all things, human. Every day, I bask in that glory of the blackness that my flesh is made up of, that my being is encapsulated in. That melanin, the gorgeousness that is out of this world. Above it all is also the beautiful soul that shines through it. So yes, I love being black, but I do not want to be reminded that I am black. 

Why? Because societal’s reminders are disrespectful, cruel, and demeaning- just like I had experienced last week. Last week, I was on Instagram, and I had come across that post. The post is about a black woman who had gone to Milan, Italy but had felt “uncomfortable” throughout her stay. According to her, she felt constantly unwelcomed, always feeling like she was about to be defrauded, and that no one was willing to help. Now, she could have been unlucky. But what about the could have? She could have been discriminated against because of her color- because she was black. 

That reminder coupled with the affirmations in the comment section made my heart drop. It was not a realization, rather a harsh reminder of the reality that black people still live in. Anyone who knows me knows about my eventual dream to travel the world, so it made me sad to be confronted with this reality. I am positive though and believe that we can change this around.

So, catch you around the world still.

PS: #Africansinukraine is trending online after Africans are being discriminated against and are being reminded of what being black is, in the midst of the ongoing war in Ukraine. Please take a moment to read about that here: https://news.yahoo.com/african-students-fleeing-ukraine-report-racial-discrimination-at-borders-234429880.html