The biggest celebrities everyone drools over, such as Leonardo DiCaprio, Ryan Renolds, Chris Hemsworth, and Matthew McConaughey, admittedly very attractive, are no longer the female gaze. Women have spoken up on several platforms that only men think that Chris Hemsworth is the appeal.
With changing generations, women are no longer interested in men that are strong and are capable of “defending” women, but in men who understand their emotional needs. Being a woman has changed so much in the past few years, and a part of that means not simply accepting the bare minimum and expecting more. So here are five things I personally think are the new female gaze.
- Being so vulnerable, it scares anyone born before 1990
So much of emotional maturity has to do with accepting that it is more than okay and, in turn very healthy to show emotions. Women don’t have to be the only ones carrying the emotional capacity in the relationship. Many celebrities have gotten popular being open about their struggles with mental health, such as Pete Davidson, and that is deemed attractive by so many women. Other stars such as Paul Rudd and Timothee Chalamet have openly been nervous and vulnerable about their life, and that is one of the most essential parts of accepting what it means to be of the female gaze. Women are no longer attracted to the emotional shut-off men who can not communicate to save their life.
2. Getting away from the “I am a man and she is a women” narrative
Being in a relationship, even a heterosexual one, people are no longer looking for traditional gender roles where a man is seen as the breadmaker and a woman a homemaker. Those days are long gone. Relationships now are more about accepting the fluidity in roles and exploring that in a relationship. Maybe this is why so many women find men with painted fingernails so attractive. One of the best examples of this is Schmidt from the show New Girl. He has always been a character that is in touch with his feminine side and ends up being an amazing stay-at-home dad which is a trope less explored by the media.
3. It’s not about the muscles, it’s never been about the muscles
We talked about some of the emotional qualities of the female gaze but let’s talk about appearance now. Men think women prefer men with muscles and 0% body fat. While some women might (taste works differently for everyone), most women don’t find that necessarily attractive. Men relate muscles with strength, dominance, and power which might have some underlying sexist overtones. Women don’t want a dominant guy, they want a genuine guy.
4. Understanding when to provide support and when to provide advice
For a lot of men, the idea of anyone ranting seems like an invitation for advice. Now, this isn’t limited to the female gaze but knowing when your partner wants to just be heard is a good thing and men tend to overcomplicate women’s emotions. We aren’t trying to manipulate anyone, you can just ask. As mentioned above communication is so important to women, when someone is venting to you you can simply ask “I hear you, would you want my opinion or want me to just hear you out, regardless I am here for you.” Is that too much to ask for?
5. Not taking credit for doing the absolute bare minimum
Having someone take care of you when needed, spend quality time with you, and overall create a non-toxic and healthy environment for you to thrive in the bar that he should meet and saying that was a lot and getting credit for that is not the best strategy to go about keeping an independent woman.
Here was a sneak peek at what women of today describe as a female gaze, obviously everyone has a different definition of the word the best solution always to anything you don’t know if you are doing right is to communicate with your partner.