On June 14th, 2022, the world came to a complete standstill. At least, it did for me and millions of BTS fans, known as ARMY, across the world.Â
The group had just released “Proof,” their first anthology album, and were in the midst of Festa, a yearly celebration during the month of June in honor of their debut in 2013. A YouTube video was posted on this day as part of the festivities, a group dinner with the promise of containing important news. I remember the buzz and excitement on Twitter at the time, speculations and theories of it being a tour announcement or another album release. What came instead was an hour of the members emotionally explaining that they would be taking a step back from group activities for the foreseeable future, and asking fans to please trust in them and this decision. A few months later, the enlistment notice came; each member, as part of South Korea’s mandatory conscription for all men, would have to complete 18 months of military service.
At 16 years old, I would’ve said this was the worst thing to ever happen to me. Now, at 20… I still feel the same. (Kidding!) (Sorta.)
At the moment, I remember not entirely understanding why they would do something as drastic as taking a hiatus. They spoke about being burnt out and wanting to find their footing as a group again by pursuing their own solo works, and to that extent, I got it. I just couldn’t grasp why they would step away during such a pivotal point in their career. They had had six different songs hit #1 on the Billboard Hot 100 within the 2 years before their break, and had been nominated and performed several times at the Grammy awards. None of it made sense to me, and despite respecting their choice, I couldn’t fully wrap my head around it.Â
It’s been 3 years now, and all seven members officially completed their service last summer. Their 5th album, “Arirang,” came out March 20th and features 14 brand new tracks. Starting April 9th, the group will take on a world tour, traveling across 23 different countries well into 2027 with more dates to come.Â
The night that I got tickets to the Arlington stop, I sat in my room filled wall-to-wall with posters of the group I love so much, their albums stacked against pieces of merchandise I’ve collected throughout the years- the same way I did when the hiatus was first announced and every time a member officially enlisted. I thought about the decision they made years prior, and how I felt like I would never understand why they did what they did; how, despite the decision seeming so big at the time, it ultimately led to their reunion and ability to work as a group again.Â
What I had learned, I realized, was that sometimes you have to start over. When things get bad, and it seems like there’s no end in sight, you need to let it all go and start again. There’s a song I’ve found myself drawn to recently by Agust D, SUGA’s alias for solo projects, called “Burn It.” In this song, he talks about metaphorically burning everything in his life down and the beauty of not knowing whether it’ll all go up in flames like the blazing sun or turn to ash when it’s all over. Towards the end of it, he raps, “I hope you don’t forget that giving up decisively also counts as courage,” and I think that, along with the entire song in general, sums up everything I’m trying to convey.
BTS had the courage to admit that they needed to step away from something they care about so deeply at what many considered the peak of their career, and without really knowing what the end result would bring. They all chose to embark on their own journeys, exploring the depths of their abilities as artists and pursuing their own solo careers. They trusted in themselves and each other to be able to start over, and that’s something I had also come to learn without knowing while they were gone. The end of high school was really tough for me, and when I graduated, I couldn’t feel happy knowing my life was falling apart. I let it all burn Ă la Agust D without knowing what waited for me on the other side, the only thing vaguely guiding me being shreds of hope I fought to not lose. I trusted that whatever it was had to be better than what I was going through in that moment, and I’m glad I did. I started college that fall and realized that it was the chance to start fresh and new, despite the unknown waiting ahead of me. I made new friends, figured out what I want to do with my life, learned to navigate my newfound independence, and many other things I otherwise would’ve been unable to if I hadn’t chosen to start over.Â
New beginnings can be terrifying, I’ll admit that. We all have to face it at some point in our lives, whether it be regarding our career and life as a world-renowned pop star or graduating and moving on from high school as a teenage girl. It’s allowing life, fate, the universe, etc. to guide you in the direction of something better, and hoping it all works out in the end. In the case of BTS, it led to the pursuit of something greater not only musically, but as people as well. It allowed them to grow and learn who they really were, and they created something beautiful; a love letter to those who trusted and waited for them, a message to those who doubted their ability to build upon the clean slate they had left behind, and a testament of what may be lying in wait when you take that leap.Â
In a few short months, I’ll be embarking on my journey to see BTS in Arlington. I’ve dropped an obscene amount of money on this comeback, and I’m not ashamed to admit it! I’ve been counting down the days since 2022 for this comeback era, and with each passing day, I find myself more and more excited about everything that’s yet to come. I know that when I’m sitting in that stadium, waiting for the performance of a lifetime to begin, I’ll look back on all the doubts I once carried with me and be thankful for what the beauty of trusting in the unknown has afforded me.Â