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Coping With BPD in College

Anagabriel Deleon Soto Student Contributor, The College of New Jersey
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at TCNJ chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

Feeling isolated while your thoughts come roaming in can be rough. Having to smile and laugh through it to everyone is not your weakness. As a college student at The College of New Jersey struggling with Borderline Personality Disorder has opened my eyes in hopes of developing healthy coping mechanisms. Whoever is reading this, I want you to know that you are not a bad person! I hope that reading this article will give you some insight on how to cope.

Getting diagnosed at 19 years old was not on my bucket list, let me tell you. However, instead of giving up and rotting in bed I have been in search of finding the best coping skills that actually work. Many things may not work for everyone, and I am one of those people who gets irritated easily by sensory toys. If you can relate, so far I found one that has not made me feel uncomfortable, and that is a jelly cube sensory toy Stress Cube Fidget Toys Adults – Sensory Toys for Kids with Autism Stress Ball – Glow in The Dark Blobfish Inside, Squishy Sensory Toy, Stress Relief Toy for Halloween, Christmas & Birthday Gift (here is the link to the one I have). I love how I can carry it with me everywhere I go. Tossing it in your bag, purse, pocket, etc is very convenient because you never know when you will have a trigger in public or at your own home. I let out my frustration on this because fidget cubes tend to make too many weird sounds which overstimulates me, if you know what I mean.

I have also found ice and cold water to be soothing. If you are home or somewhere where you can ask for a cup of ice, holding it on your face for a few minutes can help you feel a sensation that will help calm down your nervous system instantly. It also helps to put it on your wrists, keep in your hand and squeeze, and dumping your face in a bowl of iced cold water also does the trick. I understand this may not work for everyone, however scientifically it is proven to reduce intense spiraling emotions due to the activation of the “mammalian dive reflex,” which stimulates the nervous system. 

Another coping method that has personally worked for me is coloring when I am feeling stress, overstimulated, or upset. Letting your mind focus onto something else other than someone or yourself can help reduce anger from piling to explosion. Put on a face mask and do your skincare while you color, this will help your mind go into relaxation mode calming down your nervous system. There are tons of fun coloring books out there, coloring books are not just for children. Adults are allowed to color too and it is one of the best coping mechanisms as well as a new fun hobby!!

These are a few coping strategies that have worked for me personally and I hope that this helped you take note of what coping strategies to use whether they are new or giving it a try again. Remember to take a breath and know that you are not broken, we all are living one life and learning is part of it.

Hi! My name is Anagabriel Deleon Soto, and I'm a psychology major at The College of New Jersey. I was born into a proud Guatemalan family and raised in New Jersey, which shaped me into a bilingual individual who values culture, diversity, and connection. This unique perspective is something I carry with me in both my academic and creative work.
For the past three years, I have created content online, developing a passion for sharing ideas and building community through creativity. I’ve also had the opportunity to work in fashion and retail, where I learned the importance of understanding brand identity and balancing professionalism with personal style.
Outside of school and work, I enjoy simple joys like going on walks and discovering new places to recharge and stay inspired. Fitness is also a big part of my life because it keeps me motivated and balanced. More recently, I have been teaching myself how to do nails at home, which has become a relaxing hobby and another outlet for creativity.
Ultimately, I hope to combine my background in psychology with my passion for content creation to connect with people, uplift voices, and continue growing as both a student and creator.