We are entering the best time of the year. The air is starting to cool, pumpkin spice lattes are in abundance, and Halloween and Thanksgiving are on the horizon. The only thing that sneaks up to ruin my good time and perfectly curated fall vibes: the horrid notion known as ‘cuffing season’.
Fall provides endless seasonal themed date night ideas, like pumpkin carving, watching scary movies, and the coveted couples Halloween costumes. There is something about cool air and the nearing of big holidays that seems to cause everyone and their brother to settle down and start dating seriously.
And while I love this time of year and love that everyone else is falling in love, it can also drive me mad. As a perpetually single gal, it can feel like torture every fall watching all of my friends and Instagram acquaintances seemingly flaunting their significant others and showing off how in love they are.
Don’t get me wrong, I am happy for everyone who is head over heels in love! It is just hard sometimes not to give in to the green-eyed monster on my shoulder.
So this year, I am starting off on the right foot and making it my mission to survive cuffing season with as little heartache as possible. While I am not an expert by any means, I will be sharing my survival guide so that all my fellow single gals can make it through the fall together.
My top 5 tips
- Stay off social media
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The biggest component of the green-eyed monster for me: social media. Seeing couples happy and in love, posting their cute date nights, participating in TikTok trends, and overall just flaunting their love and happiness brings out my not-so-favorable side. Clicking not interested on couple-content, avoiding it entirely on silly holidays like National Boyfriend Day, and overall distancing yourself from the online showcase of happy couples can help to keep it out of mind.
- Watch movies about heartbreak, not love
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This one may sound silly, but how many times have you watched a beautiful movie focused on a once-in-a-lifetime love story and felt as though you wanted nothing more in life than to experience that for yourself? Maybe even that your life is meaningless without it? Instead, watch movies highlighting heartbreak and the negative side of relationships. My recommendations include Someone Great, LaLa Land, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and The First Wives Club.
- Pour into your friendships
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While society at large seems to prioritize romantic relationships, you do not have to. Platonic relationships are just as, if not more, important. Take this season to really immerse yourself in your friendships. Having fulfilling friendships can be so rewarding, and will help you not to feel as lonely. Plan friend hangouts with a purpose and spend intentional time growing your platonic relationships.
- Take yourself on a date
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Feeling sad you don’t have a boo to spoil you and take you out for a nice dinner? Well, try being your own date! Just like spending intentional time with your friends can be beneficial, so can spending purposeful time with yourself. The only relationship that you will be in forever is your relationship with yourself. Take this time to really get to know yourself and show yourself some love. You deserve to be spoiled and treated well, and who better to do that than yourself?
- Journal, journal, journal
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This one may seem a bit of an oddball, but stick with me. This time of year can bring up a lot of emotions, whether in a relationship or not. Journaling can be a very beneficial way to process your emotions, reduce your stress levels, and help you work through any worries or anxieties you may be experiencing. I find that sometimes my emotions feel too big and ominous to fully comprehend or process. Writing them down and being honest with myself on how I am feeling, without forcing myself to solve them or get rid of them, just simply getting them out of my head and onto a page, can feel like a weight off my shoulders. It can’t hurt, so you may as well give it a try.
The biggest things to remember during this time of year are that having a significant other does not define you in any way, your time will come eventually, and prioritizing yourself and other friendships can help chase away any feelings of loneliness. If it helps, your feelings are valid, as are your wants. You are also not the only person feeling this way, and you are not the only single gal out there. Good luck and see you on the other side of cuffing season!