To go, or not to go, that is the question. This is for the high schoolers trying to make their last decision right now. This is for the upcoming graduate students who are deciding which school they want to attend. This is for anyone who is deciding whether they want to leave home or not.
When I first went to my undergraduate school, I was far enough from home, but I still stayed in-state. It was easier for me for multiple reasons. For Pennsylvania, you get a grant for staying in-state, so it was a good decision for me financially. At the same time, I was not too picky about the school as long as the curriculum worked for me. However, when it came to graduate school, I deviated because of some of the suggestions I got from professors and librarians on campus. I applied to schools out of state. It was different, and a little scary. I had to begin thinking more about costs because to go to school out of state, you sometimes have to pay more than if you stay in-state.
While I was in high school, though, I had a friend who made what I thought was a brave decision. Maricas was someone whose life was family-oriented. It was a surprise to see her move from her hometown to somewhere farther south, but our friend group has been so happy to see all the ways she has thrived. I wanted to share her experience because it helped me feel more courageous as I made my graduate school decision.
- Tell me about where you are from and how far you decided to go to college.
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I am from Plymouth Meeting, PA. I decided to go to Fort Myers, FL to study at Florida Gulf Coast University.
- Why did you decide to go to a school that was farther away?
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I wanted a change in scenery as I had lived in [Pennsylvania] my whole life. I felt it would be good for me to experience an out-of-state school to help myself grow independently.
- How has going out of state influenced you personally? How has it shaped you as a person?
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I would say more open to new experiences, and I am more comfortable reaching out of my comfort zone. I’ve met new people, and I’ve been able to advocate for myself more since I’ve become more independent. Try to join clubs/programs that you are interested in. Check out sororities/fraternities as well. Even if something doesn’t spark your interest right away, remember to keep an open mind about them while you are looking around to see what your college has to offer. You never know what you might actually end up finding an interest in.
- What were the benefits of going out of state?
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It got me away from my home. It got me out to see new places and meet new people. It is a different lifestyle in FL and I’m glad I got to experience it.
- What issues did you have to overcome with going out of state?
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It is easy to get homesick when you are first in a new state. It’s also most often the first time someone is truly independent. These are things that come with time. Bring stuff from home to remind you of home like pictures and things from your room that bring you comfort. Things that help remind you of your place back at home.
- What would you tell others who are considering going out of state to keep in mind?
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Don’t go out of state to prove anything to anyone but yourself. If it feels right, go. If it doesn’t feel right, it’s not the end of the world.
- How have you kept in touch with people (friends and family) when you’re farther away from them?
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In this day and age, it’s easy to stay in touch with people and not get disconnected. Distance is an inevitable factor, but it can be overcome if someone is committed to keeping that friendship. You can pretty much stay in touch on any medium. However, it’s important to remember to check in even if it’s a couple of times a week. If possible, try to set specific days to call one another and do things together even if it is through the phone.
- How do you cope with homesickness?
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Try to make your place feel more like home. And reach out to people. You are never completely alone.
- What general college advice would you give to a high school senior deciding which school they want to attend?
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Choose a school that is right for you. Don’t worry about the place or the name. Just go tour the school and if it feels right in your gut then trust your gut instinct. Also don’t get defeated if you can’t survive out of state. Moving back home is nothing to be ashamed about. What is meant to happen will happen.
Overall, I understand what Maricas is saying. We need to sometimes get out of our comfort zone, if possible. It forces us to try new things while also boosting our abilities to be independent individuals. It can be an overwhelming step. I am considering so many new things that I have never thought about until recently. How am I going to find the right apartment? What about transportation? How am I going to pay the bills? I am so scared.
But we are going to grow through each experience. I know that I might make mistakes in the future, but without those occasional mistakes, I am not going to learn. It will take research and a lot of phone calls to the right people, but I think I will get through it. So will you if this is what you decide.