A year ago, I moved in with my boyfriend. He is a sweetheart who spoils me with adoration, 3 a.m. pizza during midterms and constant movie nights. But living with someone does cause changes. So here are some of the lessons I learned in a year of living with him.
First, you need something you do by yourself, and your partner does too. For me, I love to workout and have been training as a yogi since May. He prefers nights in with his friends watching football, he is allowed that space and I have learned to both ignore the football and enjoy his happiness. While he watches the game, I take time to study or go to the gym.
Boys tend to have weird senses of style, sorry babe fully calling you out here, but communicating about the reasons you want a certain aesthetic might make them understand better. If it doesn’t matter to your partner, stress that it does to you. Find a mix of your personal styles, this is their home too and they deserve to feel happy and relaxed as well.
Everyone has weird habits, and chances are they might annoy your partner. But you are not allowed to get mad about those habits if you refuse to change the habits that annoy them. It’s true communication is key, so talk to them about what is causing these issues, and how to resolve them. Don’t take this as an insult, take this as an opportunity for growth.
Find a mix of responsibilities based on your strengths. This is not a clear 50% divide, unless that works for you. I am a bossy Capricorn who loves food which means I take over most of the cleaning and cooking responsibilities, because I enjoy both. My boyfriend sticks to the few tasks that I can’t stand and ordering take out when I want a night off. You have to find what works for you.
Share who plans adventures and be willing to try new things that they love. I have been brought to multiple football and basketball games, football parties and dart matches. I am not a sports fan and I cheer alongside him and eat all the snacks, mostly because he is there when I want to go to a pumpkin patch or the theater with just as much enthusiasm, and it makes him so happy.
Have a set space to study, cause if you get in bed with your partner and turn on the TV, I hate to break it to you, but you’re done for the night. I study downstairs away from the peace and comfort of our room so I can accomplish everything I need.
It’s a big jump to live with your partner, but its also so exciting. I am so lucky to be able to wake up next to my favorite person every morning. Remember that moving in together is a big step that requires communication before the big step, and if you decide its worth it, it will bring so much joy.