What is it about visiting memory lane that makes us want to camp out and stay there a while? Is nostalgia really a liar, or were things simply much better yesterday?
Personally, I think it’s the getting older sh-t. It’s not that we’re unhappy with our present lives, it’s just that we are much more aware of everything now. We’ve gained experience in almost all our daily events. We’re no longer getting into a relationship for the first time and therefore know the hardships that come with love. We’re not driving a car for the first time and know that speeding is a rush that can costs us a pretty penny. We’ve failed a class before and know the disappointment that will reflect on our GPA.
We’ve lived and learned and sometimes looking back at the impressionable version of yourself can trick you into believing you were much happier then, than you actually were. Our brains have a funny way of remembering the details in that they don’t; especially when it comes to unpleasant times. So, when we get lost in these what-if scenarios, the lack of accurate details tricks us into believing things were much better than they actually were.
But if you sit and really think about it, you’ll see the signs that the toxic person you’ve now successfully cut out of your life, was toxic even then; and because of that now you can access these signs earlier on in future friendships/relationships.
Nostalgia will rob us of our current happiness by making all our lessons learned feel invaluable. It makes us feel blissful at the price of ignorance.
thank u, next.
Let the good times roll?
What about the laughs, and our favorite childhood memories? Maybe they involve a sibling or a best friend you don’t see as much anymore. Is the smile this type of nostalgia brings to your face just a dirty lie?
Perhaps nostalgia was never the dirty liar it is infamously accused of being. Perhaps its purpose is to remind us of all the good that has happened and that even the bad times carry seeds of good in it. Channel your inner Ari and say ‘thank u, next’ to the bad times and let the good memories fill your heart with joy and reach out to the estranged friend (if you can) and create new ones. And if you can’t reach out, be thankful still, and don’t let the sadness in knowing those times are gone take away the happiness that still lies in them when you reminisce.