This is a common problem in any sort of relationship: your significant other has that one friend you don’t like. They were friends before you were dating, but that does not ease the feeling of discomfort or irritation you get when you think about them. Maybe they did something to make you uneasy, maybe they did not. Here’s what you can do to ease your mind.
1. Figure out where your feelings stem from before jumping to conclusions.
a. Is it jealousy?
b. Did they disrespect you?
c. Does the way your partner acts toward them make you uncomfortable?
d. Is there history between them that you worry is unresolved?
e. Are you worried about how your partner feels about you?
2. Talk to your significant other about your feelings. Tell them you feel unease and why you feel have those feelings. Chances are your partner does not even realize you feel uncomfortable.
3. Set up with boundaries that you both can agree on. Like if he hangs out with her often, maybe invite you along every once in awhile to feel included or more comfortable around her. Remember that trust is key- trust your partner to not cross boundaries and do not let your discomfort sit in the back of your mind.
HCXO,
Hannah