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St. Andrews | Culture > Entertainment

Kiss All the Time. DFMO, Occasionally

Updated Published
Caroline Heath Student Contributor, University of St Andrews
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at St. Andrews chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

In the wake of Valentine’s Day, love is in the airwaves. 

Amidst (and including some of) the post-Super Bowl boom of tracks from Bad Bunny’s Grammy-award-winning album Debí Tirar Más Fotos, love songs are a prominent part of the music charts around the world. 

We’ve got the confident cadence of Olivia Dean’s Man I Need, the poetic pop of Taylor Swift’s The Fate of Ophelia, the moody melody of sombr’s back to friends, the bittersweet bars of Noah Kahan’s The Great Divide.

Modern musicians continue to contribute to the longstanding tradition of making songs about love of all kinds: love desired, love admired, love acquired, love retired. When we listen to these songs, research has shown that we are better able to engage with our own feelings and empathise with others’. 

Love songs are a platform for consideration, for conversation. And what love song conversation is complete without the mention of Harry Styles?

‘Aperture’ Lets the (Spot)light in on Love

Styles, a contributor to the love song genre since his One Direction days fifteen years ago, has recently reentered the conversation with the release of Aperture. This song is the first single from his upcoming album, Kiss All the Time. Disco, Occasionally, and breaks his four year hiatus from releasing music after his last album, Harry’s House. As of this week, Spotify has the new single sitting at 41 globally, 39 in the US, and 18 in the UK.

The song, and its respective album, have been the subject of great discussion and analysis. While some listeners were uncertain about the new song’s techno-pop sound, writing it off as a funky dance bop, many fans and media outlets alike have delved into its lyrics and found them far from shallow.

As the song’s chorus states, ‘aperture lets the light in,’ and that’s exactly how the song functions as a whole: it illuminates love or, at least, Styles’ idea of love. I know plenty about love, you may be thinking. Why should I read about a stranger’s thoughts on it?

Moreover, you may add with a furrowed brow, what’s that got to do with the title of this article?!

Let me explain.

Love Out Loud in Life and Lyrics

A cursory glance at Aperture‘s lyrics will take you through an experience of love. According to Styles, the song is about ‘allowing for more…positive things to come into your life;’ it’s about embodying an ‘openness’ to ‘transitions’ and an acceptance ‘of flaws and your own mistakes.’

Notably, Styles keeps the realm of this ‘openness’ unspecified–the ‘positive things’ he references could be platonic, romantic, experiential, you name it! This idea, in tandem with taking accountability for ‘flaws’ and ‘mistakes,’ points to the crux of the song: the importance of connection, both with yourself and others.

In the past year, there has been a rise in discourse surrounding ‘the nonchalance epidemic,’ a way of thinking and acting that involves staying detached and unaffected that is often embodied by the ‘cool girl.’ She’s low maintenance and easy going; she’s satisfied with the surface level, never investing too deeply so she can never lose too much.

She and her nonchalance are everything Aperture rejects.

‘Take no prisoners for me,’ the song starts by saying, ‘I’m told you’re elevating.’ Don’t go easy on mechallenge me, make me rise to your level. Styles shows that he’s committed to this new person, this new relationship, right off the bat. To him, commitment is not a necessary evil, but an investment, a step towards something higher.

‘I’ve no more tricks up my sleeve,’ he goes on to say in verse 2; ‘Bad boys, it’s complicated.’ I’m ready for honesty now, even though my past isn’t perfect. Styles owns up to the negative aspects of his identity as a ‘bad boy,’ but he doesn’t let his past define his present and future. The gains afforded by such honesty overcome the potential risks.

‘It’s best you know what you don’t,’ the pre-chorus states. ‘Aperture lets the light in.’ Take accountability for where you need to grow–that’s the only way you’ll be able to start doing it. Styles is teeing up his core message, framing openness as something helpful and natural, a gateway to good things ahead.

It’s Only Love

The song’s chorus brings the message home. ‘We belong together/ It finally appears it’s only love.’ At first glance, this lyric could be perceived as expressing nonchalance–Styles sees that ‘it’s only love’–but in the context of the song as a whole, it actually means the opposite. 

This ‘only’ is relief, a letting out of breath, a relaxing of shoulders, a softening of expression.

Love is certainty and comfort, something that assures Styles’ union with the other half of his ‘we.’ Love is integral and deep, something sought after and fought for; it can seem scary or dangerous, but in the end it’s really quite simple. Love requires care and intention, commitment and accountability and openness, and it’s worth it every time.

Again, the type of love Styles’ is referencing is never made explicit, so while you might assume it’s romantic love, his message holds true for any type. For all types, in fact. Because the distinction doesn’t really matter: all love, at its core, requires this rejection of nonchalance, this active investment and participation. Meaningful connection is not a one-way street.

Kiss all the Time. DFMO, Occasionally

Now, I’m not saying–and I don’t think Styles is, either–that you have to give 100% to every interaction with everyone, every second of every day. That’s impossible.

There are absolutely merits to low-stakes, low-commitment interactions with people. If that’s what you want at a given moment–if acting in pursuit of fun is how you want to embrace self love right then and there–go for it! Flirt with abandon, dance with a stranger, gossip with a friend!

Cutting yourself off from any opportunity or connection, even a shallow one, is the antithesis of Aperture‘s message. It’s just that the more meaningful interactions–the honest conversations, the hugs after a bad day, the compliments on a new haircut or item of clothing, the ‘I saw x and thought of you!’ texts–are worth doing more often. Who doesn’t want a little more light in their life?

Show the people you love that you love them. Have your fun, and maybe you’ll end up finding new people to love along the way. Kiss, literally or symbolically, all the time; DFMO, occasionally. It’s only love, after all.

Caroline Heath

St. Andrews '26

Hello! I'm a fourth-year student at the University of St Andrews, where I study English and Psychology.