I’ll be the first to admit Fresher’s Week is overhyped. Touted by universities, social media, and adults reminiscing their uni years through nostalgia tinted glasses. It is framed as an exciting rite of passage. A week of non-stop parties and a dizzying carousel of socializing where you meet your future bridesmaid or best man somewhere between the Union and Shawarma. In reality, it’s endless circling conversations of “Where are you from?'” and “What are you studying?'”. Hardly bridesmaid-level friendship making.
Ironically, I’ve yet to meet anyone whose Fresher’s Week lived up to this billing. The more I hear people talk about it, the clearer the subtext becomes: it was fine, maybe fun at moments, but mostly it was strange, lonesome and almost always awkward.
The night before I moved into halls, I had a mini existential crisis. It finally hit me how far away I was from home, despite being fully aware of Scotland’s far-from-home proximity. I felt sick at the idea of starting over in a place so different from my home. My panic-stricken brain began contemplating how embarrassing it would be to give it up and go home. I could hide in my childhood bedroom forever, right? I remember waking up and looking out at a mist-covered field and freaking out. This was a lot for my Southern California self. Would I ever see the sun again?
Slight melodramatics aside, Fresher’s week is daunting. My week was exactly as described above: fine, sprinkled with a few fun memories, but mostly clouded with nerves and awkwardness. Certainly not the seven day bender of excitement and friendship making I was promised.
Without sounding cliché, I’m here to tell you it gets better. Not in a vague, “don’t worry, you’ll be fine” way, but in a “give it a chance and ride out the first week” kind of way. The calm (or fun) will follow after the schedule-filled storm has taken place. Once the chaos of two thousand first years descending on this tiny town is over, something steadier begins to take shape and routine arrives. You begin to see the same faces in lectures and tutorials, and if you’ve joined a club or society (which you definitely should, totally unbiased but I’ve heard Her Campus is super cool…), attending the weekly meetings will give you another opportunity to turn acquaintances into familiar faces. Friendships start to form, some of them naturally- the people you bump into in the kitchen, or the ones you end up sitting on the floor with for hours during pres.
Here is the best news: you only have to do Fresher’s Week as an actual fresher once. As a second year, my Fresher’s Week has been spent moving into my new house with lovely housemates, catching up with friends, and feeling very grateful that these cobblestone streets are now somewhat familiar.
Looking back, most of the people who became important to me weren’t the people I met during a big Fresher’s night out. They were the ones who lived down the hall, the people who I saw everyday in small and unglamorous interactions. Over time, those little moments stacked up until I no longer felt anxious about belonging – I just did, naturally.
If Fresher’s week was disappointing, do not think that this is a reflection of what life in the bubble will entail. It’s not the main event; it’s only the messy prologue. The good part, the real part, will arrive later.