If you are a student, I am sure you have been told countless times to “take advantage” or “do as much as you can.” This may look like joining clubs, going out as much as you can or taking extra classes. After all, having the opportunity to attend college is a privilege; not everyone gets a chance to further their education like they might hope. If you are lucky enough to do so, you better make the most out of it, right?
Technically, yes, this is right, but as my third year of college comes to an end, I have finally learned that it is OK to not be involved in everything.
It is true: college will be what you make of it. You can do as little or as much as you want. I know people who are constantly busy with classes, clubs, friends and more, and this kind of schedule is totally manageable for them. Others focus solely on classes. Both of these lifestyles are normal. You just have to find what works for you, even though it may take some trial and error. It did for me, but now I feel so much better about what I am doing.
For the past two years, I was the student who did as much as I could. I do not regret this; honestly, my sophomore and junior years have been the most fulfilling years of my life so far. With that being said, they have also been the most stressful. It is important that you find your people, try new things and be “busy,” but if it gets to be too much, it is just as important to step back. Your mental health and your education should ultimately be your number one priorities; everything else comes after.
For most of my college experience, I have worked two jobs, held leadership positions, been a regular member in several organizations and kept up with a social life, all while being a full-time student. Being involved like this allowed me to have amazing opportunities and make some of my closest friends. These are some of the major things you hope to get out of the college experience. It took me some time, but I found them. Now, I want to enjoy them and not be stressed about everything I have going on.
I know it can be hard to say no. I overcame this fear by simply putting myself first. I had to remember that it is OK not to do something if it will put too much on my plate. If people are disappointed because of your choices and priorities, then they are the problem, not you.
You want to look back and be happy about what you accomplished during your college years. This means managing your time so you can have fun, but also putting in enough effort where it counts. You cannot do either of these things if you are too overwhelmed.
I tried my best to manage all the things I had going on, but it came to a point where it was too much. The burnout got real, but that is normal. Letting things go helped clarify the things I really care about.
My advice for those who are struggling with the need to overachieve would be to think about what brings you the most joy and about which things you will get the most out of. Leaving behind anything else that stresses you out will not be the end of the world, even if it seems like it.
I worried that people might think less of me for not being so involved when the reality is, so many people are in the same boat. They worry about not doing enough or having the best resume, but these things are not quantifiable. Whatever works for you will work for you.
The bottom line is that it is okay not to be a constant overachiever. As long as you feel good about what you are doing and who you are, then you are doing just the right thing. Yes, you should make the most out of your college experience, but make sure you are enjoying it, too!