Dealing With Loss
By: Shannon Keene
Death sucks. And we all probably fear it. Death becomes more frightening when someone close to you ends up dying. This semester has been a little rough between studies and depression from the loss of my brother. I know people don’t want to face the cold reality that someone who is really close to you will not ever come back. But you most certainly have to. I was the last one to talk to my brother before he ended up passing away. And I will hold on to that memory forever. I want to express how I have been handling it, for other people are probably going through something similar too.
First off, try to think of the positives. Think of fond memories you had with them, as well as thinking that they are in a better place. At first it felt like a piece of my heart was missing. My heart was certainly heavy. I was heartbroken about my brother and I still am. Thinking in a positive way, lightens your heavy heart. I always try to think about how he always had my back, and that he was always looking out for me. How when he walked into a room everyone would smile. These thoughts have helped me find closure.
Stay motivated and active. My brother’s death happened so suddenly before the spring semester. I was in shock that I didn’t want to go back to school. There are times where I feel really unmotivated, and you have to take a deep breath, and know that being unmotivated really can put you in a slump. If you occupy yourself with things to do, your mind will not think about what has just happened all the time.
Also, It is okay to cry! I break down randomly sometimes, and that is certainly okay for it is part of the healing process. Don’t hold your emotions in, for they will eventually just build up and consume you. And that is certainly not healthy if you are trying to heal.
Lastly, talk about it to the people you love and care about. In a time of loss, it is best not to shut people out. Family is so important and my family and I have become closer because of this. Talking to a counselor or a psychologist is helpful too, for death can be traumatic.
I really wanted a great year with my brother, but he will always be in my heart. I don’t necessarily feel sad as much anymore, I just feel lost. I know I will be okay, it won’t be today, but I will be in the future.