It’s often during the times when we feel the most alone that we need to be reminded the most how many people there are out there who have experienced similar feelings or circumstances; or even if they haven’t, are still there offering support. Majority of people feel too afraid or embarrassed to express or open up to others when they’re at their lowest point- I know I certainly have in the past. Over this last year, I have had to face difficult experiences that unfortunately are just accepted realities of life. In order to heal, instead of focusing on the negatives of this time, I decided to center in on the good that came from it and that significantly impacted the influence it had on me. Now for this to be possible, I had to learn how to become vulnerable with those around me, which was one of the most difficult things I’ve ever had to do.
Within the span of four weeks in the beginning of 2022, I somehow survived a terrifying car accident and dealt with the effects of all of my personal items being stolen from my car.
The night of the accident, there was a car that was running a red light that had been red for at least eight seconds, driving in the perpendicular direction of me, at sixty miles per hour. I truthfully am not able to recount most parts of it; I only remember seeing my airbags fly up, smelling smoke, and hearing a car behind me honk to try to warn me that a car was about to barrel into my car and me. I can remember being inside of an ambulance, and seeing my mom next to me, with tears in her eyes. To say the least, I was traumatized from not only experiencing this, but not even being able to recount certain parts of it.
Apparently, I swerved the car to the opposite side in the last second so that the car would slam into the passenger side of the car, which although I have no memory of doing that, had been a factor that saved my life according to the cops.
After this incident, I wanted to fade away from society and hide in my room where I was sure nothing bad could happen to me like that again. But I understood this was not reasonable; I had to keep moving forward. The first thing I did was I told all of my friends and teachers what had happened, and that I was in a tough spot mentally; though this was hard I felt immensely gratified at the amount of support I was receiving day after day, whether that was modifications of due dates because of rough mental blocks or flashbacks, millions of hugs, and so many shoulders to cry on.
My friends truly were the ones that got me through that time. I will never forget hugging my friends for the first time after that incident, and how letting people around me know what was going on was probably the best thing I could have done at that moment. I had a whole network of people that I could depend on to be there on the worst days. I was a mental wreck, breaking down and navigating mental trauma, but with the people I loved by my side through it all, I knew I would eventually feel better, and with time, the feelings I was feeling would slowly fade off and become quieter.
Not even a full three weeks had passed following this event when I drove to my favorite running trail to go for a run, only to find out when I got back, that someone had smashed open my car window, rummaged through all of my things, and took all of my personal items. We tracked my
electronics to a store where the robber sold all the electronics I had hidden in the car before the run. I watched that store put up my electronics on their website for sale and watched them slowly be taken down as people were purchasing them.
But I don’t dwell on this part of the story because of the beautiful silver lining of this entire event. Apparently, my school bags which had all of my books, folders, and papers from senior year of high school up to that point, were thrown into a random dumpster in the city of Philadelphia. Because my name and title of my school was in my schoolbooks and bags, three park rangers who had seen them in the dumpsters, decided to take it upon themselves to drive them over to my high school for me.
Though everything that could be sold was sold, and though all of my books were soaking wet, unsalvageable from the rain, I had never been happier and more relieved to see some of the items that I had assumed I would never see again. The fact that those three park rangers made the effort to look for a name in those bags and took the time to drop it off at my high school so that I could at least get to see pieces of what had been stolen from me was one of the greatest gifts I could have been given at this time.
It reminded me that good people really do exist in the world, and that good can sprout even from the worst of situations. Not only did I have my parents, my friends, my teachers, and the kind-hearted park rangers, but I also reflected on these two events and found so much good that came from it.
I recounted how after my window had been shattered, the cops let me sit in their warm car in freezing temperature while we were tracking my electronics. I remembered how when my school notified me that people had found pieces of my backpacks in the dumpster and were dropping them off, how I actually was so paralyzed I fell to the floor in tears, in utter shock and how two of my best friends came down on the floor with me and hugged me as I sat there crying. I reflected on the endless support from my teachers; not a day went by where one of them did not check up on me and how I was doing. I remembered the janitor from my high school who found me crying on the phone with my parents, who literally offered to buy me a new computer, which though I politely declined, just showed me that such good people and such good hearts existed in this world.
Though I had been shown a lot of cruelty over those three weeks, I had been overwhelmed with endless support, love, care, and hope. And so, I decided to focus on the beauty that came from the most eventful three weeks of my life, and it was the most life-altering thing I have ever done or experienced.
Though incredibly traumatic experiences may occur, that does NOT mean that good cannot come from it. I also realized that life is so beautiful because of the people we surround ourselves with. I learned that no number of stolen items were sufficient enough to steal away my happiness. The only thing that mattered was that I had a heartbeat; that meant I had a purpose and a reason to search for the immense amount of good that was thrown my way throughout a very challenging time. I hope if you’re out there reading this that you know you aren’t alone, and that there are a countless amount of people here ready to support you with open arms. Becoming vulnerable with those around you is immensely difficult but can be one of the most amazing gifts you give to
yourself. Keep your head up. Time will heal. It will all be okay even if it may not feel like it at the moment.