It was inevitable that I would be faced with heartbreak at one point or another. I will do my best to keep this from getting too deep, but I did not know going into college that I would endure some of the lowest lows. I felt so unloved by a relationship that seemed to be strong and was never going to end. When it suddenly came crashing down, I felt like I had been blinded and ran into a wall fueled by fury and anger and, most of all, confusion. Who deserves this? Little did I know I’d come out of the situation happier than I had ever been able to imagine. College led me to someone who fit into my world perfectly. No matter what life throws at us, he is by my side pushing me to be my best self and love myself first before letting anyone try to take power over that. No matter who says that’s corny, the best advice my college experience has gifted me is put yourself first and love yourself always before loving someone else.
Sophomore year, I was introduced to a guy I immediately connected with, goofing around, and sharing everything I had ever experienced in my lifetime with such ease. Although this may sound like common sense to most people, at the time I did not think to value this kind of friendship and hold onto the trust that this guy was giving me. I let my mind and heart venture to someone who did not value me, but remained blind enough to ignore the one true person who would go to the ends of the world to see me happy, successful, and loved. No matter what I was being told, I was dumb enough to continue into a repeating cycle of disappointment and feeling not good enough to be loved.
Halfway through junior year, I knew it was time to let go and stop pursuing someone who simply played with my emotions, as if they were replaceable. Now back to the guy from sophomore year, through judgments from those I knew and those I didn’t, I pursued the love I had always had for him. Some believed that I was meant to be with him all along and that I was the one to fail my previous relationship. I learned that no matter what you are told on the outside, the one person that knows the whole truth and your heart is yourself. I have never been so grateful to hit a low that made me remember to put myself first.