When it comes to relationships, whether its friendships or significant others, I have a hard time letting them go, even when I need to.
The summer before freshman year of college, I was in a relationship. We had been talking for all of senior year in high school. Everything was great. We started dating at the tail end of the school year.
As soon as I graduated high school, we spent every moment together that we could. After work, on weekends, and sometimes even during our lunch breaks.
We went on different adventures big and small, such as hiking Watkins Glen, going to the zoo, dinner dates almost every other day, and even just little movie nights at home.
As the summer came to an end, I noticed things getting a little rocky. He had decided to go straight to the workforce, where he works from 6:00 a.m. to about 7:00 p.m., six days a week, and I had decided to continue my education into college.
He knew I was going to school. Even though its only about an hour way, he found it hard to be away from me.
We had multiple talks about what was going to happen when I left. Neither of us knew how often I’d be home or even how often he was going to be able to come see me.
So, we decided to take a break, which was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. I truly loved him.
As the school year went on, we were on and off. At one point we were talking again, and then the next thing I knew we weren’t.
I noticed a pattern. When I was home, everything was fine and dandy, and then when I’d leave to come back to school, it went right back to the way it was.
On and off, on and off. And it went on like this for months.
We then decided to unadd each other on all social media platforms, and if it was later meant to be, then we would handle what was going on between us then.
There is no beef and no hard feelings, however, at this moment in time, we were just not meant for each other.
To this day, we still don’t talk. Almost a year and a half later, no contact.
We have mutual friends that seem to like keeping us both in the loop, but other than that, nothing.
And I’m slowly learning that I need to let go… No matter how hard it is. I have now learned that sometimes you have to go through these type of relationships to learn more about yourself and what you deserve.
I deserve more… I deserve better…