I hate how the internet popularized the term “delusional.” Maybe it’s the psychology student in me, or maybe I’m just sensitive, but since when has it been funny to make someone’s warped mental state into a meme? Don’t get me wrong, I’ve probably reposted hundreds of posts about being “delulu,” but recently something in me has flipped. Â
I’ve always been open about my mental health struggles. The way that I work through my problems is being open, sometimes too open with my friends about what I am going through. I’m not necessarily proud of it, but I’ve been known to share some of my darkest thoughts during casual conversations. I realize it can make people uncomfortable at times, but my true friends know that I’m the type of person who needs to get things off of my chest in order to feel content with myself. Â
Unfortunately, this way of coping has subjected me to often being called “delusional,” “crazy,” or other terms that can be used to refer to someone with an abnormal mental state. Although I can sit here and blame myself for it, I believe that we, as a society, should do something about the casual use of these terms. You are not crazy for having an atypical way of processing something.Â
Most people who know me know that I have a hard time moving on from failed relationships. One of the single most challenging tasks over the course of my life has been to accept that something isn’t meant to be. I’ve been known to make a big deal about any small ounce of intimacy, grasping onto something even if everyone else thinks that it’s barely there. Although this attribute consumes my thoughts and often leaves me lying awake at night, it serves as a running joke amongst my friends about how I’m “delusional.” Am I though?Â
Okay, I can’t get over my ex, but have you ever thought that maybe I don’t want to? It’s my own life, not some made up narrative. I may sit here and overanalyze certain elements of moments, but these are the moments who have made me the person I am. I have the right to attempt to understand them. I’m simply a human being processing the highs and lows of my own unique experience, and to be honest, I find that beautiful. Just because my mind doesn’t work the same way as yours, doesn’t mean that I’m crazy. Â