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SBU | Wellness > Mental Health

Being Comfortable In The Uncomfortable

Cadence Evans Student Contributor, St. Bonaventure University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at SBU chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

It feels as if my whole life has always been in an uncomfortable position, whether it was knowing where my next meal was going to come from, wondering what kind of trouble my older brother was getting into, or being the messenger for my divorced parents. Every single aspect of my life had felt uncomfortable, and let us just say it became comfortable being in the uncomfortable. I was used to CPS being involved in my life and constantly being afraid that I was going to get framed by other friends or even adults that my brother had gone to prison. 

I was used to being known as the girl who had a brother in prison. When I was younger, I tried to hide behind it, but as I got older, I realized that it was impossible to hide behind. My brother being in prison was now part of my personality. It almost felt like I had been in the cell with my brother. 

Now that I am older and am comfortable telling the story of my brother, people are shocked by how comfortable I am with having this happen to me. People often tell me how sorry they are for me that I had to go through this. To be honest, this became a normal part of my life, and I was always confused about why people were sorry for me. I was eight years old when my brother got into drugs, so for me, it was just something I had to live through.  

I feel as if I wouldn’t want my life any other way though. Everything that I have been through has taught me to have a patient soul, which is definitely going to help me as a teacher. I am not a person to judge one’s actions knowing that people make mistakes, and even often I forgive people’s mistakes they make towards me way too much. I will always be a listener who will never judge anyone’s situation because I know how it feels when people do. I’ll never make assumptions about people, because all the people that thought I would turn out like my brother had the wrong assumptions. 

Overall, always having uncomfortable experiences in life has made me as an individual comfortable in these times and able to handle the toughest times of being an adult, and for that, I am thankful every single day.  

Cadence Evans

SBU '26

Cadence Evans is a member for the St. Bonaventure Her Campus Chapter. This is her second semester in Her Campus and is super excited to continue growing her writing.

Cadence is currently a senior studying Early Childhood, Childhood, and Special Education with the concentration of STEM. Aside from Her Campus, Cadence is also a member in the Bonaventure Education Association, as well as KDP, and is super passionate about teaching. With that Cadence spends a lot of time student teaching, and on top of that she works as a lead teacher at the YMCA.

In her time away from academics, Cadence loves to spend time at Cradle Beach Camp where she works. She also loves to travel, especially with friends and family. Cadence studied abroad in Italy for a month and absolutely fell in love with traveling the world.