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San Francisco | Life

What Moving in with My Partner Has Taught Me

Starr Washington-Moo Student Contributor, San Francisco State University
This article is written by a student writer from the Her Campus at San Francisco chapter and does not reflect the views of Her Campus.

Moving in with my partner has been an interesting transition, to say the least, but what was I expecting? Now that we’re finally settled, here are some things I’ve already learned about living with my significant other.
You Don’t Have to Do Everything Together

The best thing about living with your partner is that you always come home to each other at the end of the day. You can catch up on extra work and go out with friends or family, and your partner will always be around at the end of the day. You no longer have to make time throughout your day to message or meet up with them because you now live together!

You also drift away from that stage of wanting to do everything together because you see each other at home. This is my favorite thing about living with my partner because it makes you feel like a well-rounded adult learning to balance school, work, friends, family, and your love life.
Accepting Each Other’s “Bad” Habits
We all are guilty of “bad” habits…

  • Leaving the TV on
  • Not hanging our clothes back up after we try them on (That’s me!)
  • Playing our music, a little too loud

It’s tough to fix each other’s bad habits, and sometimes, it’s because there’s nothing that needs to be fixed. We all have different living styles, and when you’re now cohabiting with your partner, you recognize some of their “quirks.”

Instead of trying to change each other entirely and running into argument after argument, learn to embrace each other’s imperfections. If their “bad” habit isn’t something that’s a safety, health, or comfortability concern, then learn to let it go.
Creating a Routine

It’s essential to develop a routine early into the move-in process. Some things should typically stay the same (School/Work schedule), but if you both want to wake up and make breakfast in the morning or go to the gym together in the evening. Make time for it, but don’t let it interfere with your school/work schedule.
Acknowledge That You Both Need Alone Time (and that’s okay!)

We all need a break sometimes. If you are exhausted, burnt out, or need time alone, communicate that to your partner. It’s totally healthy to want to be by yourself sometimes, the key is how you tell somebody that you want to be alone. Don’t be cold or rude with your approach, make it clear that your partner isn’t the reason why you feel the way you do. If your partner communicates to you that they need alone time, respect their wishes and don’t get offended by their request.
Plan One Night a Week for Spending Time Together

With all the craziness of school, work, and other responsibilities, sometimes it’s easy to forget that you should enjoy living with your significant other, that you should value how the relationship has matured, and that you’ve gotten to this moment. That said, take at least one night

out of the week to spend quality time with each other. Whether it’s going to your favorite restaurant, a special event in town, or staying home and watching your favorite show together, make sure that you acknowledge to one another that you are happy with where you’re at in your relationship. Living together can have its ups and downs (Totally normal!) but recognize that some couples don’t even make it to the point where you’re at, so truly appreciate and grow from the experience.

Starr Washington is a Her Campus national writer and recent San Francisco State University graduate, where she studied Broadcast and Electronic Communication Arts with a minor in Africana Studies. She contributes primarily to the lifestyle and culture verticals, with a growing portfolio of op-eds, reported features, and interviews spotlighting Gen Z voices.

Starr is deeply committed to centering Black stories in her work and consistently champions Black creatives in film, literature, and travel. During her time at SFSU, she served as director of the university’s multicultural center, organized campus-wide cultural celebrations, and taught a student-led course she created titled “Intro to Black Love.”

Outside of Her Campus, Starr is a spicy romance book lover, fiction writer, a wife, and soon-to-be mom.

She’s a Scorpio from Michigan.