College by far has induced the most stress and exhausted my mental capacity, and I’m only a first year in my second semester. It’s overwhelming being away from home and at first I viewed everything as a huge adventure. Don’t get me wrong, it still is, but the path changes. At first I was excited for the new people and new environment and new learning opportunities. I was finally out of high school and this is what those four years seemed to be leading to. Everything seems amazing and intricate. I got to meet so many people at once and there seems to be an artificial close college bond that makes everyone seem closer than they actually are until they actually become close. I got to learn to be independent and taking matters into my own hand, such as going to the bank and asking for five dollars in quarters to work the washing machine. It’s a whirlwind of just new when you’re in college, but the one thing that I’ve realized is most important when entering college (and just in general but especially now) is taking care of your mental health.
When I mentioned that everything can get overwhelming, I mean that it can get so overwhelming to the point where you feel like your head is going to explode. Adapting to the new environment, trying to get work done, and trying to be social with people that may or may not be temporary get’s exhausting. I’ve often found myself retreating back into a ball of loneliness after being around people for so long. And not in a sad loneliness, but in a sense that I was recharging and refocusing my energy which in a sense was me taking care of myself. But even doing that gets stressful as I see those that I hang out with go out and explore while I just want to sit and do nothing. But now I’m realizing that I shouldn’t let the fear of missing out hold me back from mentally resetting myself. There have been multiple cases where I forced myself to go out and although I had fun, I came back feeling more exhausted than ever which then makes the reset process even longer.
I’ve also realized that taking care of your mental health in college isn’t as selfish as it feels. I sometimes feel guilty for leaving a group of individuals I normally hang out with for chilling with one or two other people, but in reality I’m just feeling calmer and in a refreshed setting that I was craving to have. I shouldn’t feel guilty for doing what I want and sometimes all I want is to pamper my skin while those around me go out and sometimes I want to sit in silence all day while everyone else’s heads are in the stereo. College is by far the most complicated experience I’m facing and the value of taking care of myself has dramatically increased. You only get this one mind and this one body so to do what you can to replenish and rejuvenate it when it’s feeling gross and tired is a necessity. Take care of yourself because at the end of the day you’re the one tucking yourself into bed.