The beginning of the pandemic had us all isolating and socially distancing, which meant we had to get creative with how we chose to spend time as to not risk getting cabin fever. Many held zoom parties, cooked, did work outs and DIY / arts and crafts, re-decorated, and found ways to make being home a bit lonely with the help of technology and retail therapy.
For me, this time was one of very quick self-growth and contemplation. Two of my grandparents who were still living in Russia back then got COVID along with many other loved ones, and I was out of work during those first few months, wondering how I would be able to pay my bills each month. 3 weeks of lockdown quickly turned into 9, and though time went on, the world seemed to stop.
To combat the anxiety, I threw myself into going back to school, creative outlets, hopping on zoom with Charli XCX plus all of the angels to be a part of the creation of How I’m Feeling Now (read my article on PC Music for more on that!), and more. Through the ups and downs of it all, I unexpectedly had a bit of a spiritual awakening.
I have always been someone who used herbs and candles and mantras as well as manifestations, however this was the time when I fully became immersed in the world of crystals and spells, as well as different practices done by both witches and Pagans. It was then, mainly through witchtok, that I was introduced to moldavite.
Moldavite is a tektite, meaning that it is made out of natural glass formed out of terrestrial debris. It originally come from a meteor that fell down to earth over 14 million years ago, and can now be found in the Czech Republic – however due to the online craze of recent years, it is becoming more rare. The reason why it is such a hot commodity, is that moldavite is known to completely turn your entire life upside down and get rid of everything that does not serve you. It is a very intense and aggressive energy, and so it can shake you to your core due to the unhinged and unapologetic ways this powerful gemstone works.
I was late to hop on the bandwagon, but fast forward to 2022 and my life was once again at a standstill. I had finished and graduated from my previous school and gotten into another, however due to different hurdles that life had thrown my way, I was not making progress as I had been earlier on in the pandemic, and overall every aspect of my life was not progressing forward. After doing my research for authenticity purposes and going to my usual most trusted sources for crystals and gemstones, I ended up I ordered my first piece of moldavite in the form of a ring. A few weeks later, I got the package, and as I opened it and held the ring in my hand, I felt the strongest vibration I have ever felt. It was practically begging me to put it on, but I held off at first.
It took some time to get used to having it, and to be honest I avoided wearing it for a while due to my own mind being scared of change and potentially losing things and people I had become attached to. However, I eventually got comfortable wearing it every single day, and sure enough, odd things started happening at a rapid-fire pace. First, I learned the hard way that I needed to work on my finances. This past year has been filled with one unexpected emergency expense after another, and there were some points where I definitely had to get creative and see what I could do to ensure I had what I needed to get by. I also started selling and getting rid of things, as in the past I had used shopping and spontaneous purchases to make myself feel better during moments of insecurity or uncertainty, which led me to accumulate quite a lot of possessions I didn’t really use or need the way I thought I would. This moldavite wanted me to spend less on material things, and more on experiences.
The car had many issues as well, and after weeks of trying to get it to pass the smog, we were told that it had a blown head gasket and that repairing it would cost about the same as getting another car. I had to go back to Poland during the holidays to see my family, even though tickets were way too expensive and I knew it would take me time to recover from that, given I had gone during the summer as well – ultimately, some family members were dealing with major health scares and I knew I wouldn’t forgive myself if I didn’t see my remaining grandparents while I still could, so I justified both trips despite the financial hardship on my part.
My health also took a hit in some ways, as well as the health of my beloved cat Kimba, and those experiences made me understand that I had to most of all, prioritize health and happiness. On top of that, a long term relationship I was in ended quite suddenly, and through being left blindsighted, I was forced to come to terms with the fact that this was not the person for me, as much as I had wanted him to be.
I dealt with all of this quietly behind the scenes. I hibernated and went about my days, often times feeling as though I was in a hamster wheel. Then came the time though when I knew I had to let myself grieve, and do what I have always done in difficult times – pick myself up and pour my heart into my art and work.
Moldavite gave me a rude awakening, but I am so eternally grateful, because without it, I wouldn’t have made the steps to make active changes in my life and to focus on my goals instead of someone else’s. At the end of the day, you are the one stuck with you, so it is imperative that we all learn a little self-love and give ourselves some grace and compassion. I don’t have all of the answers yet, but I am as always, learning to trust the process. Do I recommend getting moldavite? Absolutely – but only if you are ready to put in the work.
For more information on moldavite: