Lately, I’ve been hearing people say things like, “I could never dress (or have make-up) like that,” to me a lot. My immediate reaction is asking, “Why can’t you?” Over the years, as I’ve spent more time accepting myself and trying to build up my self-confidence, I have finally come to the point where I’ve found the courage to wear whatever I want, whenever I feel like it (to a certain socially acceptable extent, that is; I still refuse to go out on the street completely naked).
The more I hear people telling me they could never “pull that off,” the more I’ve started to ask myself, “Why is it that we’re thinking this way?” Ever since I was a kid, I would go to school and teachers would tell me what my appearance should be, while my parents would tell me to wear only certain things on certain occasions. I will have to admit, I am still very much in agreement with the social dress code most of the time. Yes, I still think it is disrespectful and inappropriate to wear hot pink at a funeral unless that’s what the person would have wanted. I still can’t appreciate when a five-year-old is doing better makeup than I do. I believe, just like everything else in the world, that there is a “too far” in fashion, as well.
Despite how stubborn I am, I still have a sense of rebellion inside. Sure, it’s nice to be respectful, but does that really mean that I can’t dress up a little when I hang out with my friends?
Despite the insecurity I might still have, as I am spending more time in an environment where I can encourage myself to express who I am, I’ve found it more and more justified to “peacock” and expose my true fashion style. I’ve started to wear clothes that I’ve had for years and never had the courage to put on before. I used to come up with all sorts of excuses like, “I will wear that when I’m skinner” or, “I will wear that when I’m pretty enough.” Sadly, those excuses were never original, and I’ve heard them a thousand times from other people, as well.
But here’s the question, why do you think that you aren’t enough for that dress right now? I never got skinnier or prettier; if anything, I’ve gained weight, but people didn’t seem to notice when I finally put on these clothes. The only thing that has changed completely is my own perspective.
I realized that I’ll never be enough to myself, that there is a voice in my head that I will have to fight for a long time. I will always want to look a little skinnier, prettier, etc. But here’s the thing you can never take back: Every second you waited to look “good enough” for an outfit was time you spent not being yourself. So, why wait any longer? Why let everything else stop you from being you?
Let me ask you again, why can’t you pull that off?