As I settle into my final semester of college, I find myself continuously reflecting on the past seven semesters. I didn’t feel it happen all at once, but when I think back to four years ago, I realize that I am a completely different person than that 18-year-old who just entered college for the first time. I have had countless challenges throughout these years, and due to this, I strongly associate each semester with a particular lesson that I will carry with me for the rest of my life. These lessons are as follows:
Fall – Freshman Year: Plans change.
At 18 years old, it is common to think that you know just about everything that there is to know about the world… or at least about your own life. When I was beginning college, I thought I had everything figured out. This was the perfect school for me which allowed me to be able to continue pursuing dance and learn about my dream career in communications. I never anticipated having a difficult time making friends or finding new and different passions in different places, such as beginning figure skating again after quitting in high school. The life I looked forward to and romanticized definitely strayed from the solid plan that I set as a senior in high school, but this allowed me to grow and find the path I am truly meant to be on. You can’t plan out your entire life and changes are natural as you grow as a person.
Spring – Freshman Year: Never take an opportunity for granted.
During my second semester, I happened to fall into a news-writing class which allowed me to write for the school newspaper. It was an entirely new experience that was sometimes stressful but ultimately snowballed into changing my major to journalism. When the time came to apply for an editorial board position I was hesitant and doubtful in my abilities. Fast forward to today, I am now the managing editor of content for the entire publication. Had I never submitted an application for a leadership role, let alone taken the class at all, I genuinely would not be the person I am today. These opportunities changed the trajectory of my future career and taught me to seize every possible opportunity that presents itself to me.
Fall – Sophomore Year: Good friendships take time.
Throughout my first year of college, a major struggle for me (and many freshmen) was making friends. I found it difficult to meet people who were looking for new friends as it was, but forming a meaningful relationship was even harder. By the fall semester of sophomore year, it became apparent to me that good friendships simply take some time. Personalities don’t always mesh, and you shouldn’t force anything that just doesn’t work! I learned to have patience with myself and others and only put effort into growing friendships with people who put just as much energy into me.
Spring: Sophomore Year: Always take the risk.
I spent the spring semester of my sophomore year studying abroad in Ireland, a decision made partially on a whim, which definitely had its risks. I traveled overseas without a single friend for four months, after all, that isn’t really a choice for the faint of heart. To be completely transparent, it was an extremely difficult adjustment between making friends, culture shock (and daily rain…), and homesickness. It was emotionally draining. However, it was also one of the most exciting times of my entire life, and I will never forget it. I learned so much about myself and got to see multiple new countries. Letting the fear of “what if” stop you from making a decision will always leave you with regret. Take that risk; you’ve probably already thought of the worst possible case scenario, anyway.
Fall – Junior Year: Don’t be afraid to step away from what isn’t serving you.
When I was back on campus during my junior year, I had already developed friendships from college and taken a little break from seeing those friends for a semester. This break allowed me to learn who was genuine and true to me and who treated me less well than I deserved. At this time, I worked to improve the friendships that were meaningful while also distancing myself from those who were less deserving of my kindness. This lesson applies to other aspects of life as well… Sometimes you are committed to something for years when, in reality, it simply isn’t a true passion for you! That’s okay. Your college years are for learning what serves you best and what you can let go of. You can ditch anything that is bringing you down.
Spring – Junior Year: Say “YES” more.
After I turned 21, I felt more inclined to say “yes” to things. I tend to enjoy spending my weekends relaxing at home, but this can also lead to missed opportunities. There is no need to pressure yourself or feel pressure from others to go do something you have no interest in, but sometimes deciding to attend something new leads to more opportunities, a new interest or a new friendship! You don’t have to hit the local clubs or frat parties on the weekend if that isn’t your vibe, but try saying yes to attending a sports game or more unique activity that you may have declined in the past… You may just find yourself much happier than you were lounging around each weekend.
Fall – Senior Year: Put yourself first.
In the fall of my senior year, I made a difficult decision to put myself first. I broke up with my boyfriend of four years, who had seen me apply to, get accepted to, and attend my first three years of college. This was incredibly difficult to face, especially because the relationship wasn’t particularly bad; I had just never had the opportunity to focus solely on myself since I was 17 years old. I’m also not sharing this to express that all relationships are limiting, but it truly was a decision that I personally needed to grow and flourish. You deserve to put yourself first when you are young. Life is long; most people spend the majority of it married and eventually with children. Now is the time to just do you. College is all about self-exploration. Do what makes you happiest.