Hangover Horror Story

Sometimes I drink more than I should. I mean, don’t we all? Well, last night I drank more than three humans should. Combined. Two strawberitas, svedka, shots, mixed drinks… the whole nine yards.

And this morning? I paid for it tremendously.

I was hoping some diner food would cure my hangover, so my friends and I went to a diner off-campus. I was feeling like death- maybe still even drunk- but I was praying that this food would help. Halfway through breakfast, I wasn’t feeling so hot. I threw up in the bathroom and went back to sit down with my friends. At least I “got it out of my system” they told me.

Oh if only.

As we were paying, I started to feel really nauseous. I told my friends I’d be right back, and ran to the bathroom. The bathroom was small: it only had one stall (which was currently in use) and one of those sideways trash cans where I couldn’t really throw up in it unless I stuck my body into the trash can itself. As I was trying to figure out my plan of action, my body decided for me. I had no control over it. I projectile vomited across the room and it hit the stall door in front of me and started sliding down (while the lady was still in there!), and then I tried to cover my mouth with my hand. The puke hit my hand and then sprayed back at my face. My face was covered in my own vomit and I had to wipe puke off my glasses. It was all down my coat and then I stuck my head in that trash can. The top of the trash can fell on me and I was soaked with more vomit.

“Excuse me, miss. I’m really sorry, but I just threw up everywhere. Watch your step.” I said as the waitress came out of the stall.

“Are you pregnant?” She asked. She didn’t even really seemed bothered by the puddles of throw up she was stepping into on the floor, or my soaking wet appearance.

“No. I’m sorry. I’m just hungover.” I felt so bad.

“It’s okay, me too! I’ll get the busser for you so he can clean this up.”

What a gem that waitress is :)

I threw out my coat and scrubbed my face, but I knew I smelled awful. I went to the front to meet up with my friends. When we were in my friend’s car, I told them what happened and he rolled down the windows. He told me that the windows were down for my own sake, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he had rolled them down to air out his car. I smelled like the worst kind of vomit imaginable.

Embarrassment level: 10/10