The end of September means one thing for all frosh: the official celebration of having survived the first month of university. The first month of university is never easy and with each new day, new class, and new wrong turn on campus, you learn a little something. As a frosh who has managed to make it out (and all in one piece), I’ve learned six things from this very wild first month.
1) It’s okay to not know what you’re doing. It’s not supposed to be easy.
Everybody knows the feeling of getting physically lost around campus, or being mentally lost while you’re sitting in class as your prof is lecturing about what seems like rocket science. Everybody knows those days where you have to put up a fight with the laundry machine, or those days where you just want to stay in bed all day because you can’t find the will to get up and work. I’m sure you’ve had those homesick, fatigued, frustrated days. The first month, while mostly sunshine and rainbows, is also filled with stress, tears, and panic as you’re just thrown into this new life. And honestly? I learned that it’s okay to be a hot mess the first month (or even all of first year!). I think some of us come in expecting that we have to be all put together and we’re totally going to kill it, but the truth is that you’re not going to have it all together and what everybody should be telling us is that it’s okay to be a wreck sometimes. The start of anything isn’t supposed to be easy ‒ and that’s okay. It’ll all come with time, and it does not have to happen in the first month.
2) A 3am lake swim can be a good idea.
Everything about the first month is new – new home, new friends, new experiences, new everything. I’ve learned that the first month is all about stepping outside your comfort zone and exploring more of that ‘new.’ It’s all about doing the things you wouldn’t normally do and saying “yes” to so many new experiences and situations. First year, and especially the first month, is such a precious time to create memories and collect all these stories. These are all the stories that you’ll be telling five months or five years down the line. So, if a friend asks you to grab cake with them at 11pm on a Monday night? Say yes. And if a friend asks you to go for a lake swim at 3am on a warm night? Definitely.
3) And pizza at 1am.
Kingston (and various spots on campus) have a ton of good food late at night. Sometimes you just need to let loose, give in to the craving, and eat some damn good late-night pizza. Lesson? Poutine after midnight is so, so good.
4) You need to find your people.
If there’s anything that the first month of university has taught me, it’s this very thing. You need to find your people. Find your study partners, your girls’ night out group, your gym partners, or your shoulder to cry on. Find your Friday night gang, your lunch buddies, or your upper-year mentors. I learned that the first month is all about trying to make as many quality friendships as possible because these are going to be the people you’re going to be surrounding yourself with during your first year (or all four!). They don’t need to be on your floor of your residence. They don’t need to be in your classes. They don’t even need to be in your program or faculty. They can be anyone, anywhere. All you need is to find that person – the Cristina to your Meredith, the Monica to your Rachel. So get out there, reach out to people, find a friendly face, be a friend, and lean on them when you need help, because nothing is better than investing time in new friendships.
5) A night of Netflix in bed should be prescribed at least once a month.
From frosh week to the first week of classes to your first all-nighter to catch up on all the readings you “forgot” to do – university is a crazy time. It can get super busy, SUPER fast. So, I’ve learned that it’s so important to schedule in some “me time” every once in awhile. Whatever it is you need to do to recharge and get re-centered, do it. Whether it’s a night in bed binge-watching The Office or just going to sit by the lake for a bit, do it. If you’re like Amy Poehler, go ahead and down those 10 beers. Try to do your de-stressing activity from time to time so you don’t burn out, which can happen so easily in the first month if you’re trying to pack everything into your schedule at once. Time alone can be just as important as time with friends.
6) Avoid the 6:30pm dinner rush like the plague.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned from the caf, aside from the do’s and don’t’s of what to get, it’s that the 6:00pm to 6:30pm rush is one of the most annoying things you can ever experience at Lenny or Ban. During my first month, I, unfortunately, had far too many experiences standing in line for twenty minutes for stir fry, or fifteen minutes for a bowl of salad. And this is after waiting fifteen minutes just to get into the dining hall. I’ve learned that sometimes, if you want to save time, you just have to eat early at 5pm or 5:30pm, even if it means snacking on popcorn and chips in your room at 11:30 later that night. The empty dining hall and short lineups are so worth it. And there’s more food left over!