November has always been a weird month for me. It’s not the holiday feel of December yet, but that “new semester” excitement is gone. It gets dark around 4 p.m., it’s cold on the walk to class in the morning and finals suddenly feel way too close.
Somewhere in all that chaos, November ended up teaching me something I didn’t expect: how to be patient with myself.
It wasn’t some dramatic breakthrough, but more of a slow burn. Being that this is my first semester of college, it’s been very tiring, and I’ve had a lot of time to reflect. I’d sleep eight or nine hours and still wake up exhausted.
I kept waiting for the moment that everything would click and I’d feel motivated again, but it never came. What did come was the realization that I treat patience like a reward I only deserve when I’m performing well, and that’s just not realistic.
Growth is boring
I would always imagine growth as something obvious or aesthetic, but November reminded me that most growth is slow. It’s like getting out of bed in the morning and it’s still dark outside or doing the homework that you really didn’t feel like doing. None of it is very exciting, but it still matters.
Slowing down isn’t failing
It felt like everyone around me was in their “grind era” while I was the complete opposite, just doing my work when I felt like it or occasionally studying when I thought I needed it.
Slowing down actually made things better, though. I started to notice the fresh air hitting my face on my walks to class, or how beautiful my campus is in the fall/winter time. I wasn’t rushing. I let myself breathe and take in everything slowly.
You can’t be everything at once
November piles on the pressure: group projects, exams, speeches, events and the general burnout of being a college student. I kept expecting myself to be able to juggle everything perfectly, then wondering why I was so exhausted every day.
My reflection throughout the month has taught me to be more patient with myself. I can’t do everything, and I’m not supposed to.
Small wins deserve more credit
Finishing a reading for class? Win. Making it to an early class when it was 30 degrees out? Win. Staying in instead of forcing myself to go out when I needed a break? Another win.
November showed me that the small wins count, and they’re proof that I’m trying.
It’s ok to change your pace
November is basically a transition month, and I think that’s why it hits so hard. It’s messy and in between, but that’s where a lot of change and growth happens, in my opinion. I let myself adjust my routines because during the winter months, it’s okay to not jam-pack my entire schedule.
Changing my plans and slowing down when I need to really helps me. I stopped expecting everything to stay the same. It brought me a kind of relief that I didn’t realize I needed.
So here’s what November taught me: Patience isn’t waiting for everything to fix itself. It’s choosing to be kind to yourself while you’re figuring things out.
Being new to college life, I didn’t really realize the adjustments I’d have to make in my lifestyle. In high school, I was so used to just flying by, but now I actually need to put in effort. Instead of spiraling about all this new stress on me, I try to remind myself that I’m allowed to be a work in progress.
This is new to me, and I should give myself time to adjust. I can take things one step at a time. Maybe that’s the whole point of November: slowing down, resetting and giving yourself room to breathe.