As someone who’s had little to no intimate exchanges on Penn State’s campus, I find myself to be extremely qualified to discuss the best hookup spots on campus. We’ve all heard of snogging in the stacks and hand holding in the Bryce Jordan Center – but have you ever heard about having a Fifty Shades of Grey worthy make-out session inside of Beaver Stadium? How about steamy sessions on the most Instagram-able spot on campus aka Old Main itself?
I know I come across as having no experience of such events (probably because I haven’t), but that doesn’t mean I lack the common sense of the best places to go to lose your common sense. So, I’ve compiled a list of the best hookup spots on campus so all you Penn State risk takers can pull a Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf:
1. The 50-yard line of Beaver Stadium during an Ohio State football game.
110,000 of your closest friends will be helping you fight to the finish!
2. The counter of any Starbucks at 9 a.m. on a crisp Monday morning.
Nothing says good morning like two coffee beans rubbing together to make some espresso!
3. Go a little Troy and Gabriella on the “High School Musical steps” in the HUB during lunch hour.
You’ll be hitting Sharpay’s high notes in no time!
4. Another inconspicuous place where no one will ever to think to go is the library during finals week!
This place is like a ghost town, so you and your partner will really have a good time hitting the books in the stacks. Just watch out for paper cuts!
5. Ever thought about getting your pancakes flipped at the Waffle Shop at 11 a.m. on a Sunday?
After a long Saturday night, all the other Penn Staters are cuddled away in their beds. If you and your partner are looking for some real alone time, go to the Waffle Shop and order the scrambled eggs – let me know how it goes!
6. If you’re more of a scenic lover, then Old Main lawn on the first nice day after a dreary winter is the place for you!
After a cold and brutal winter, there’ll be no one outside on the first nice day. However, I wouldn’t recommend a hammock if you get motion sickness easily. Also, you’ll have the bell from Old Main tower helping you keep track of time if you and your partner are trying to set a new record!
7. Go to Willard around 1 p.m. and you’ll have the infamous Willard Preacher saying sweet nothings to you for hours at a time!
If you’re someone who likes to hear some positive reinforcement when your body is getting reinforced, then this is the perfect place for you.
8. The advising offices never have a line the second week of class, so you should go and advise your partner into the right anatomy class!
Here’s a little Penn State secret for you: all academic advisors take off the second week of every semester for a little “me time.”
Happy snogging, collegiettes!