Whether you have the immune system of a champion or get sick the second someone sneezes, there’s no denying the germ pit that is college. Put a bunch of young people together, add a little alcohol consumption and a large lack of sleep, and you have yourself the perfect recipe for the PSU plague. So, if you’ve ever been miserably unhappy in Happy Valley, here are nine stages you’re probably familliar with.
1. Denial
I managed to make it this long, so I must be immune, right? That sore throat in the morning means absolutely nothing, and my nose must be stuffed because of allergies. Even though it’s freezing. Yeah, allergies. That must be it.
2. Bargaining
How many different meds can I take before something bad happens? I NEED to go to class today. If I drink water all day, I can totally get better before I get really sick. It’s probably just a 24-hour thing anyway. The fact that my roommate hasn’t left her bed for two days means absolutely nothing.
3. Regret
Why do I always share food with people? I should really wash my hands more often, carry hand sanitizer and probably eat healthier. Then, maybe my immune system would have been able to fight this off. This is all my fault.
4. Acceptance
All I have eaten for the last few days is soup, and I can’t even taste it. But it’s okay because I caught up on all the TV I’ve missed. Sleeping is also nice – I haven’t felt this relaxed in a while. It’s kind of nice being alone and having nothing to do.
5. Restlessness
Is it possible to be sore from NOT moving? I’d honestly rather be in class right now than be stuck in my room for another second. I’ve almost run out of ramen, and I’m fairly certain I’ve built up a tolerance to NyQuil™. I’ve been sick long enough, don’t you think? Time to get better.
6. All better!
I feel great today. I can actually breathe, and my stomach is not wreaking havoc. Feeling the fresh air is amazing, and I can actually see everyone I know. I think I’ll go out tonight – I need a change of pace.
7. Just kidding.
Maybe going out wasn’t the best plan. Now I’m hungover AND sick. Fabulous. Another season of Grey’s Anatomy it is.
8. Getting caught up.
Maybe I shouldn’t have waited until the last minute to get all my missed work done. I have no idea what’s even going on because I missed lecture. Should I email the class for notes? No, I hate getting those emails, too. Office hours it is.
9. All better… again.
I kind of miss staying in bed all day. Maybe I still feel a little sick… nope. I’m fine. Plus I don’t want to miss any more work anyway. But I do wish I was watching Netflix right now.