What’s spookier than goblins, vampires and ghosts combined? Guys in college. Even though the guys that we involve ourselves with may cause us to inhale Snickers, actual men are not that enticing… but, what if they were? Here are the six types of guys you meet in college if they were candy bars:
1. Whatchamacallit
This is the guy who can’t decide what you are to him. Are you his friend? His hookup buddy? His side piece? You’re probably never going to find out, but at least you’re his whatchamacallit!
2. Butterfinger
This type of guy is constantly dropping the ball. You keep inviting him to formals, tailgates hosted by your parents or dinners with your friends – and he just can’t seem to show up. Don’t even bother asking him to take you to Walmart to shop for groceries, because he’s going to forget.
3. 3 Musketeers
This guy can never be without his squad. They’re probably more cliquey than you and your girl friends. All you want is some alone time with him, but don’t be shocked if he makes your dinner reservation for four instead of two.
4. 100 Grand
This guy can’t leave his house without being dressed in designer clothing. He’s constantly talking about how much money he has or the new item he just bought, but just because he wears that Gucci belt doesn’t mean there’s much behind the buckle.
5. Twix
This guy must have multiple personality disorder. One minute he’s the sweetest, and the next he’s making you sob outside of Champs. With this one, it’s hard to tell which side – the right or the left – will be the correct choice.
6. Kit Kat
This is the type of guy who has to take things one step at a time. You can’t call him your boyfriend right away, just like you can’t bite into a Kit Kat all at once. Hopefully, this won’t be the type of man that wants a break!
I hope that your Halloween is filled with less guys and more Fifth Avenue bars, collegiettes!