Cutting negative people out of your life can be extremely difficult, no matter the person. It is hard to let go of a bond that you invested yourself in even when you may know the situation is toxic. Despite this, it is very important to surround yourself with positive people and know when it is time to let go of bad ties. Two of our writers decided to write about their own experiences with cutting people off to show how it has benefited their lives:
When it comes to cutting ties with friends, the decision may not be entirely easy. There comes a time when we all look back and wonder if our friendships are healthy, or if they are growing to become poisonous. Our friends become bad influences, corrupted with new ways in how to attract a crowd, or at least that’s how it was from my personal experience.
One of my best friends from high school was obsessed with gaining attention from any guy she came in contact with. She would ask me to come on double dates with guys I had never met and stay out late, all the while I was lying to my parents saying I was just at a sleepover at her house. She would always pressure me to come along with her on dates with these guys she had met online.
When it came time to leave for college, I knew I had the chance to finally stand up and say something. She wanted to stay friends throughout college, even though we were going to different schools, but I stood up and said it wasn’t the best idea to do so. I told her that she was pointing me in the wrong direction and that she was selfish to only think of herself. Surprisingly enough, she agreed and apologized for it, but even to this day, we aren’t very close and rarely speak. I hear from her from time to time and she hasn’t changed much. She still uses Tinder to meet guys and go on dates with random boys, but it doesn’t bother me anymore because I don’t have to tag along. Sometimes it is best to cut people off when it is obvious that they are using you, but there are other times when you need to be that wake up call to summon them back into reality. The line between these two extremes is not always obvious, but in time, it will become so.
Cutting people off, it sounds negative doesn’t it? Well, not if the person herself is causing negative influences in your life. When I cut the most negatively influential person out of my life, I felt a weight was lifted off of my shoulders.
I was the happiest I had been since knowing this person, and I have never looked back on, or regretted my decision. So this is what happened: in highschool I became friends with a girl who was known for partying and being a wild child. Before meeting her, I was against underage drinking and sneaking out to parties. Initially my goal was to change her life to be more like mine, but it was soon after that I realized drinking had ravaged this girl's life beyond repair or savior. She simply loved partying too much to ever want to be ‘fixed’ with my young wisdom.
As time went by in our short-lived friendship, I blatantly decided to go to a party with her. At the party I sat back and claimed “no thank you, I don’t drink,” to every person who offered me a not-so-virgin drink, then the peer pressure started kicking in. Long story short, I attended a handful more parties with this girl. I started realizing how far from my true and pure values I had drifted from just this one negative person in my life, so I quit being her friend, cold turkey. Cutting this girl off was by far the best decision I have ever made because it led me to where I am today as a strong, passionate, successful, and motivated individual who keeps to her morals and values.
Just remember Collegiettes, if there is someone negatively influencing your life it may be best to -