We all know the feeling of waking up on a Sunday afternoon feeling as though someone drove a bus full of screaming children through your head. Then you realize you have to get up and be an active member of society. But, let’s be real, it’s all worth it because you are now a beer pong legend at the Fi Sigma frat on campus. Sadly, that doesn’t change the seven-page paper due Monday that you put off until today. You are praying for the end of the world or a zombie apocalypse so you don’t have to write your paper and you can just go back to bed. Unfortunately, the chances of that are slim to none, so instead, I’m here to help you cure the hangover!
Water – I would be willing to bet you’re a poor college student, too, so I’m going to offer up the cheapest option first. Go get yourself some “Ice Cold Water” (Sandy Cheeks, anyone?). Scientists believe this doesn’t really work but if it can create a placebo effect and cure your headache, well I call that a win for your head and your bank account!
Any Greasy Food – Yes, my friend, that does include everyone’s favorite food, which we would take a bullet for…pizza. Since the water didn’t work, it’s time to grab your student ID and head down to the dining hall for brunch. One of the best things you can do for a hangover is eat some greasy food. The most important part of that is being able to keep all your greasy food down. A good way to avoid the hangover altogether is by eating before you drink so the food can absorb the alcohol. Eating greasy food the day after has a similar effect.
Gatorade – It has a very similar effect that water has on a hangover, but the goal of the Gatorade is to replenish the electrolytes lost the night before. “Even though the diuretic effect of alcohol may cause the body to lose some electrolytes, it’s not so much that you need to replace them right away,” says Samir Zakhari, Ph.D. Regardless, replacing your electrolytes can’t hurt, and, hey, it tastes better than water!
Exercise – I know what you’re thinking, “HAHAHA I’m not even going to read this one because who is crazy enough to exercise when they are hungover?” I agree with that 100%. The only reason I will go for a run is if that adorable little fluff ball is at the end of the finish line wearing a sweatband.
I hope one of these hangover cures works for you so you can be a fully functioning member of society! Now get off the Internet and go do your schoolwork!