I think hate is a strong word, but certainly one that is fitting for you. Your ability to determine one’s worth with stale boxes of chocolate and wilting roses is astounding. Lovesick hearts yearn for sweatshop teddy bears just to feel lovable. Hopeless romantics spend themselves out of house and home in the name of ‘love.’ It’s almost as if we can’t be satisfied until every inch of our being is covered in tacky candy hearts. All of it is for you.
However, this zealous ask for overspending is not to overshadow your worst habit. Your exclusivity somehow manages to make guilt and love synonymous. If one is incapable of meeting your maximalist idea of romanticism, not only are they unworthy of your love, but also of their partner’s. You make no exceptions for those who are unable to participate, whether it be because of financial stress, limited time, or a relationship that does not fit your heteronormative standards. It is shocking that a day dedicated to love can be so isolating.
Yet somehow, no matter how much I try to resist you, you’re always there. Billboards, commercials, and the nauseating pinks and reds that adorn every store are all silent reminders for those who are not worthy of you. I can picture it now… every couple on social media competing for the biggest and best show of romanticism. Perhaps there is something primal about it. Carefully curated Instagram posts full of flower petals and candlelit dinners are to us as feathers are to a peacock; nothing but an attractive display. Maybe silly little birds believe in you too.
Regardless, when the chocolate gets eaten, the roses die, and the teddy bears get thrown away, the world moves on. You tend to do that, as if a year’s worth of love can, and should, be reserved just for you. I must admit, I look back on my early years with you in fondness. However, that may simply be because the anxiety that is now in me was once in my parents. But maybe I just haven’t met the real you; perhaps I am blinded by your corporate mask. And so I ask you, Valentine’s Day, is this what love is?
Love, Emma Frederickson
P.S. For my queer brothers, sisters, and siblings, I hope you can safely celebrate both yourselves and your relationships this holiday. I understand that the marketability of Valentine’s Day can stir up some strange emotions, so I wish you the best in showing your love not only today, but every day of the year. I encourage everyone, queer individuals and allies alike, to use this holiday as a source of self-empowerment rather than external validation. Last but certainly not least, if someone hasn’t told you already, I love you.