As much as I have tried to fight it, some things will always get the best of me. Though I’d love to say that everything can be controlled and that we can always have the upperhand, life doesn’t seem to work that way. Over these past two semesters I’ve worked hard on accepting these realities and focusing on moving on from them rather than trying to fight them.
-
Sometimes your friends get sad and you can’t help them. Be it because a friend of theirs has died and you just aren’t the voice they want to hear. Perhaps they are drunk and determined to find that certain someone who calls them pretty, or they just failed a major test. No matter what, sometimes your words just don’t help even if they have previously. People get lost in their heads a lot and it can take a lot to pull them back out, but even sitting with someone in silence can be what they need. There have been many moments where I sat in silence on one end of the phone listening to a friend cry because that’s all I could do for him. For others, I have been the one who never mentioned the issues at hand, recognizing that I was the escape boat that they needed to forget about the harder topics.
-
Sometimes you get sad for no reason and you need to just ride it out for a few minutes. Today I was listening to music and eating dinner and suddenly, I felt like I needed to cry. It wasn’t that anything was wrong or that anything had happened, it was just a moment where things suddenly weren’t good for a few minutes. Sometimes it will last the whole day, other times, it will hit me bad when I’m trying to be social. Suddenly I feel like I’ve been pushed into a frozen lake and my brain short circuits. These moments are random, and they suck, but there isn’t really anything to do besides ride it out. You can go get your favorite food, sit with a friend, do a facemask, but these things aren’t going to make it go away. Sometimes you just have to be sad.
-
Shit happens, really bad shit that shakes you to your core. Life has a way of coming at you with situations you desperately hoped would never occur and you can’t stop it. You adapt and pick up the pieces and cry a lot and keep going because that’s how life is. These past few months have been absolute crap but the semester has just started and I want to be in school, so I have to keep moving and pretending that everything is fine until it actually is. No one is lucky enough to get through life without obstacles and some of us get a bunch of them thrown at us all at once, but take a deep breath and keep going. It’ll work out, or at least grow numb over time.
-
Siblings handle things differently than you do, so don’t pick a fight. This goes for friends too, or anyone who is unlucky enough to also be affected by the situation. My younger sisters go to their friends to heal, enjoying the distractions and opportunities to do something fun. I prefer to be alone or to face the situation head on. Sometimes I just have to remember that they are coping in their own ways and to not get annoyed with them. As for friends, we once had a situation that tore apart a lot of people and ruined three friendships in one night. I wanted to check on one person and make sure they were okay with the new situation, but one of our other friends wanted to avoid him at all costs. Their trust had been shattered and they needed to heal, whereas I just wanted to make sure everyone was okay until they were no longer my responsibility (mom friend). Let people heal their own way, and recognize that some people need more time than others.
-
Stress comes with being human. We aren’t lucky enough to glide through life without thinking and overthinking and panicking, so the best we can do is take the time to figure out what we need to cope when we are faced with this stress. For the longest time, I just wanted to find ways to avoid it all together, but all that did was make me irritated with myself when I was unable to prevent it from occurring instead of taking a step back and finding a way to make myself feel better. Situations will always get the better of us and we have to know how to ride it out or we aren’t going to be able to make it through life. Stress is a part of life and you have to know how to deal with it or everything gets much more difficult.
Life has a not-so-great way of reminding us that a lot of things are possible and the best we can do is make sure we can keep going. It’s not possible to be prepared or to fix every situation, so take a deep breath and remember that it’s okay to cry.
Now I’m cold sweating and eating a whole box of pasta, but I know that I’m completing my homework and that my family and friends are doing okay, so I’ll be okay too.