There are no pause, fast-forward or rewind buttons in life. Things are constantly happening, and sometimes unexpectedly. In stressful situations, it can be difficult to keep your head above the water and continue to push on. Honestly, I haven’t handled stress healthily. I’m always telling myself, “I’ll do a better job (coping) next time,” but the same cycle repeats.
In my case, my mind shuts down. I can’t process the world around me and my body reacts by panicking. I know I overreact, but it seems unavoidable. I excuse myself by saying, “I can’t help it.” However, I know I can help it. It’s just going to take time and effort.
Here are the steps I’m going to take to improve my coping skills and hopefully you can use these too the next time you start to panic:
Step 1: Believe in yourself
How are you supposed to improve if you don’t feel like you deserve to be okay? Everyone makes mistakes. They’re what enable us to grow. Beating yourself up and losing confidence will only set you back farther. Remind yourself that you’ve survived worst days and, “This too shall pass.”
Step 2: Identify the problem
If you don’t know what’s wrong, you can’t do anything about it. What is the source of your stress or anxiety? For me, the things that overwhelm me the most are unfamiliar situations or times when I feel like I don’t know where to begin. What has triggered a reaction out of you in the past? Is this similar to that time? Are you thinking realistically about the problem, and if not, can you get to a place where you can rationalize the situation?
Step 3: Identify the solution
Is the problem something that can be fixed right away or is it going to take time? Some traumatic experiences will never go away, but should just be accepted because they’re in the past. Think about the immediate actions you can take to stop yourself from becoming irrational. This may be to remove yourself from a space, get some alone time, or pick up a book or a different kind of distraction. If you are somewhere you cannot get away, write down your feelings and work through them to develop a plan.
Step 4: Take action
It’s time to implement your solution! This can be the hardest part because fear can hold us back. Solutions can involve difficult conversations, breaking habits, and taking time out of our busy schedules. However, it is worth it to lift a burden off your shoulders because less stress will allow us to perform better in our daily lives. Not to mention, you feel better when your mind is in the right place.
Step 5: Move forward
Once you have solved or overcome a particular problem, don’t find new stress in it. Focus on the good things that you got out of it, like a healthier lifestyle or mended relationships. Also, just because something has been fixed, doesn’t mean you can stop working on it. Continue to learn and grow from your mistakes to prevent negative emotions in the future.